Suicidal Moment - EstherTuesday, March 31, 2009
Saturday, March 28, 2009
鱼在水里哭 - 深白色2人组
鱼在水里哭
我握着你的手说
鱼在水里哭
你笑着说别傻了
鱼并不会哭
它们是一种没有眼泪的动物
树在雨里哭
我抬头看着你说
树在雨里哭
你温柔看着我说
树并不会哭
它们是没有思想情感的植物
我突然的无助
没有眼泪的悲伤没有人清楚
只能呼吸着不被了解的孤独
一个人仅仅祈祷一切会结束
我矛盾着无助
很需要你能给我一点点保护
想对你说的话却总说不出
我变成了植物
没有人在哭
你摸着我的头说
没有人在哭
我在哭只是没有人在乎
#music#
我突然的无助
没有眼泪的悲伤没有人清楚
只能呼吸着不被了解的孤独
一个人仅仅祈祷一切会结束
我矛盾着无助
很需要你能给我一点点保护
想对你说的话却总说不出
我变成了植物
没有人在哭
你摸着我的头说
没有人在哭
Thursday, March 26, 2009
The Candid Moment - Farhah
The Bored Look
Failed Cute Look
The Farhah's Look
The Red Riding FarhahThis post is dedicated to Farhah, didn't expect I have so much "nice" pictures in my computer.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Monday, March 23, 2009
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Camping @ SU
I, will be camping at SMK Subang Utama, SS18/1A Subang Jaya 47500 Selangor from 18th March to 20th March 2009.
It's a scout camp.
May the mosquitoes spare me.
P/S: Apparently it didn't. =(
It's a scout camp.
May the mosquitoes spare me.
P/S: Apparently it didn't. =(
Monday, March 16, 2009
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Genting Trip
I was back in Genting yesterday.
A trip to Genting to see our little friend, Kiat Ming who is studying at Genting Inti that is located at the city right below Genting Highland, Gohtong Jaya. It's been a long while apparently, the time didn't even slow down or what so ever and left us missing everyone that moved on. Her birthday is coming soon, Esther wanted to see her, bad enough to dragged me up to Genting Highland with her, and of course, her boyfriend too. Their birthdays are 2 days apart, it's going to cause a dramatic effect on my wallet, I suppose you can see my wallet rip apart and gone with the wind.
Oh well, they are both important to me, as friends and the memories they gave me during my high school years.
Kiat Ming is from a small city in Johor. I'm not sure how to spell it exactly, but I remember it means "handsome" in Hokkien. That I can recall very cleary, because she was very proud about that fact and she had been literarily spamming me about that. Simple and easy going girl in the big big city here in Kuala Lumpur satelite city, Subang Jaya. Esther is her bestest friend when they are both in the same class, while I'm at the next class. Occassionaly we will combine class during Moral Studies, then we will engage in a totally random conversation with no particular reasons. Kiat Ming ate in my house sometimes, with her housemate, Yi Wen that time. When you are leaving alone, cooking is always a hassel, and my mum cooks, so... yeah.
We stayed back in Subang Jaya when we moved on to college, Kiat Ming went Genting Inti, taking the Hospitality Course. It's been a year since we last seen her, due to the fact I went to National Service, and then she went to National Service right after me, it's been a really long while.
A very long while.
It is weird when Genting do not make me anticipate and excited about it anymore, it's like a melted chocolate on the floor, it's still chocolate but ultimately it's not really there anymore. So technically, I went to Genting to see an old friend and blow some cold wind. That day were not that sunny, yet it were not that cloudy either. The thing that I was glad about is the wind. At least I did not went up there to bath in the sunshine.
I was tired the whole time. I do not have an idea on what is going on with me, but I was tired all right. We drove to the Genting Skyway and sat the cable car up to the Genting Highland, I checked with Kiat Ming that day, if sit KTM from Subang Jaya Station to KL central, change to the Genting Bus, then sit cable car to Genting Highland cost around RM 10.40 per single trip. It is highly possible when I got fed up and suddenly appear at Genting Highland and appear back in Subang Jaya at night.
It's almost like magic. =)
Ate at a restuarant for it's cheap lunch set, but my sweet and sour chicken rice did not taste anything near sweet nor sour, it was flat. I would not want to complain anymore about that, got a tendency to get a very predetermined answer:" It's Genting mah!"
I did not want to get on any single ride, due to the fact that the price are just ridiculuos. RM 8 - 12 for a ride? No thanks. Went to the arcade to find the Para Para Paradise machine - Nope, not there anymore. Alternative? A spoilt Virtual Cop 3 machine and some unadjusted aiming for Ghost Squad. Screw Genting Highland, I shall just sit at the side and let the cold wind blow, best still, it's freeeeeeeee.
Around noon, we met up with Kiat Ming and threw her Charlie, the teddy bear we bought for her, which is almost equal her size. Kiat Ming gave Esther her birthday present too, some smaller PINK teddy bear which Esther then named it as "Fen Fen" (Powdery). I shall "lol" at the name for at least a month. We went to bowling and I broke my nail, all Esther's fasult, she forced me to play. =(
Kiat Ming didn't stay long, she is a busy girl now. Studying in Hospitality Course means new friends, lots of them. She joined her classmates at Genting Highland for a buffet dinner paid by their lecturer. Who would have miss that, right? I was waiting outside for Esther and her man outside somesort of rare species animal exhibition while they went inside for RM7 each.
I didn't want to go in.
Then, we went back down and ended up eating in Bentong at Bukit Tinggi. The food was okay and it was cheap, but what I learned was 椰花酒, direct translation will be coconut flower alcohol. I didn't like it, maybe it is because I didn't like alcohol in general, and Esther didn't like it too, too gasy apparently. The drink is unique, as it smells bad, but taste surprisingly much better than the scent. The alcohol content is not more than 3%, said the wise one. It looks almost like isotonic drinks, smell like rotten coconut, taste like cocktail. Stunningly amazing.
I reached home an hour and a half later, with some unhappy event.
I am puzzled over the facts of relationships.
Always.
A trip to Genting to see our little friend, Kiat Ming who is studying at Genting Inti that is located at the city right below Genting Highland, Gohtong Jaya. It's been a long while apparently, the time didn't even slow down or what so ever and left us missing everyone that moved on. Her birthday is coming soon, Esther wanted to see her, bad enough to dragged me up to Genting Highland with her, and of course, her boyfriend too. Their birthdays are 2 days apart, it's going to cause a dramatic effect on my wallet, I suppose you can see my wallet rip apart and gone with the wind.
Oh well, they are both important to me, as friends and the memories they gave me during my high school years.
Kiat Ming is from a small city in Johor. I'm not sure how to spell it exactly, but I remember it means "handsome" in Hokkien. That I can recall very cleary, because she was very proud about that fact and she had been literarily spamming me about that. Simple and easy going girl in the big big city here in Kuala Lumpur satelite city, Subang Jaya. Esther is her bestest friend when they are both in the same class, while I'm at the next class. Occassionaly we will combine class during Moral Studies, then we will engage in a totally random conversation with no particular reasons. Kiat Ming ate in my house sometimes, with her housemate, Yi Wen that time. When you are leaving alone, cooking is always a hassel, and my mum cooks, so... yeah.
We stayed back in Subang Jaya when we moved on to college, Kiat Ming went Genting Inti, taking the Hospitality Course. It's been a year since we last seen her, due to the fact I went to National Service, and then she went to National Service right after me, it's been a really long while.
A very long while.
It is weird when Genting do not make me anticipate and excited about it anymore, it's like a melted chocolate on the floor, it's still chocolate but ultimately it's not really there anymore. So technically, I went to Genting to see an old friend and blow some cold wind. That day were not that sunny, yet it were not that cloudy either. The thing that I was glad about is the wind. At least I did not went up there to bath in the sunshine.
I was tired the whole time. I do not have an idea on what is going on with me, but I was tired all right. We drove to the Genting Skyway and sat the cable car up to the Genting Highland, I checked with Kiat Ming that day, if sit KTM from Subang Jaya Station to KL central, change to the Genting Bus, then sit cable car to Genting Highland cost around RM 10.40 per single trip. It is highly possible when I got fed up and suddenly appear at Genting Highland and appear back in Subang Jaya at night.
It's almost like magic. =)
Ate at a restuarant for it's cheap lunch set, but my sweet and sour chicken rice did not taste anything near sweet nor sour, it was flat. I would not want to complain anymore about that, got a tendency to get a very predetermined answer:" It's Genting mah!"
I did not want to get on any single ride, due to the fact that the price are just ridiculuos. RM 8 - 12 for a ride? No thanks. Went to the arcade to find the Para Para Paradise machine - Nope, not there anymore. Alternative? A spoilt Virtual Cop 3 machine and some unadjusted aiming for Ghost Squad. Screw Genting Highland, I shall just sit at the side and let the cold wind blow, best still, it's freeeeeeeee.
Around noon, we met up with Kiat Ming and threw her Charlie, the teddy bear we bought for her, which is almost equal her size. Kiat Ming gave Esther her birthday present too, some smaller PINK teddy bear which Esther then named it as "Fen Fen" (Powdery). I shall "lol" at the name for at least a month. We went to bowling and I broke my nail, all Esther's fasult, she forced me to play. =(
Kiat Ming didn't stay long, she is a busy girl now. Studying in Hospitality Course means new friends, lots of them. She joined her classmates at Genting Highland for a buffet dinner paid by their lecturer. Who would have miss that, right? I was waiting outside for Esther and her man outside somesort of rare species animal exhibition while they went inside for RM7 each.
I didn't want to go in.
Then, we went back down and ended up eating in Bentong at Bukit Tinggi. The food was okay and it was cheap, but what I learned was 椰花酒, direct translation will be coconut flower alcohol. I didn't like it, maybe it is because I didn't like alcohol in general, and Esther didn't like it too, too gasy apparently. The drink is unique, as it smells bad, but taste surprisingly much better than the scent. The alcohol content is not more than 3%, said the wise one. It looks almost like isotonic drinks, smell like rotten coconut, taste like cocktail. Stunningly amazing.
I reached home an hour and a half later, with some unhappy event.
I am puzzled over the facts of relationships.
Always.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Thursday, March 12, 2009
想太多
我常常会寂寞.
但是每一次在这种情况下, 我想东西的频率马上超速.
可能比Ferrari还要快. 又多.
我不知道这应该是好事还是坏事.
因为, 我可以很光荣地说:
"我用很多层面看事情."
又下雨了.
好想唱独南拳妈妈的"下雨天".
我发现我最近很忧郁, 虽然即兴唱歌的症状没有改善过.
可以很平常地继续生活, 纵使我是在伤心着.
感觉自己好像小丑.
好累噢.
但是what can I do?
又想唱歌了, "还是会寂寞..."
-待续-
但是每一次在这种情况下, 我想东西的频率马上超速.
可能比Ferrari还要快. 又多.
我不知道这应该是好事还是坏事.
因为, 我可以很光荣地说:
"我用很多层面看事情."
又下雨了.
好想唱独南拳妈妈的"下雨天".
我发现我最近很忧郁, 虽然即兴唱歌的症状没有改善过.
可以很平常地继续生活, 纵使我是在伤心着.
感觉自己好像小丑.
好累噢.
但是what can I do?
又想唱歌了, "还是会寂寞..."
-待续-
Saturday, March 7, 2009
怎么了
她脸上的笑容渐渐地消失了.
我肯定有事情发生了.
不管是什么事都好.
一定离不开爱情, 亲情, 或友情.
她不快乐的时候, 我非常担心.
她虽然是个独立坚强的女生, 但是情感方面却不那么强.
我实在是担心她.
或许... 是我做错了什么.
又或许... 最近几年下来她真的也累了吧!
"嘿, 怎么了?" 我都在问着她.
但是, 我知道我从来都没有得到我要的答案.
"我知道, 但是..." 她总是这样地回我.
我尽量在我的能力范围内让她快乐.
至少, 我会在那里.
陪着她.
最近放假了, 所以常常没有在家里.
因为我都出去了.
跟她出去了.
也不知道要如何能让她快乐.
纯粹, 尽身为朋友的责任.
因为, 她总是让我担心着.
"我做人的原则是: 对自己好一点." 我看着她, 想知道她的原则是什么.
她不清楚.
在她清楚之前, 就让我对她好一点吧.
不, 可能这已经变成一种习惯了.
她可以习惯等待.
我想我习惯担心了.
我肯定有事情发生了.
不管是什么事都好.
一定离不开爱情, 亲情, 或友情.
她不快乐的时候, 我非常担心.
她虽然是个独立坚强的女生, 但是情感方面却不那么强.
我实在是担心她.
或许... 是我做错了什么.
又或许... 最近几年下来她真的也累了吧!
"嘿, 怎么了?" 我都在问着她.
但是, 我知道我从来都没有得到我要的答案.
"我知道, 但是..." 她总是这样地回我.
我尽量在我的能力范围内让她快乐.
至少, 我会在那里.
陪着她.
最近放假了, 所以常常没有在家里.
因为我都出去了.
跟她出去了.
也不知道要如何能让她快乐.
纯粹, 尽身为朋友的责任.
因为, 她总是让我担心着.
"我做人的原则是: 对自己好一点." 我看着她, 想知道她的原则是什么.
她不清楚.
在她清楚之前, 就让我对她好一点吧.
不, 可能这已经变成一种习惯了.
她可以习惯等待.
我想我习惯担心了.
Friday, March 6, 2009
Missing Max
Maybe I'm sentimental, I don't know.
The process of moving on has a significant side effect on myself, the hollowness. "It's a phase, Jun Haw." Esther had been telling me that like hundreds of times already. Of course, it's a phase, now what?
I miss people that made my life interesting, made it different, made it who I am today.
I miss Max, which is what I'd been calling him for years already. No, he is not gone. He just gone to Singapore. He is the one that exposed me to the Adobe Photoshop program and because of him, I got almost full marks for all of the event graphic design projects. And he is the reason, I got into the design department for the event project. And he is going to be the reason I ended up in the creative field. The time where he was sitting in front of the computer, in a pro shop in Lake View Club where we both were working part time there, he will be like: "Want to learn how to do this?" I will be running to the computer by then. The steps are fuzzy, the memories aren't. Max is 9 years older than me if I still remember it clearly, it feels real good when he's around, as I never had an elder brother before. Able to learn and depend on someone is something I never got a chance to experience it before.
I remember the day when he needs to get something somewhere and he had only a manual car to use which he not used to it. The ride was bumpy, but it was different that any other ride with parents. I remember the day when his girlfriend argued with him in a car, he turned around and said:"Jun Haw, you want my laptop? It is yours now." after her girlfriend shut his phone, he wanted to jump off the car apparently, I nodded my head, real hard as his laptop is a Mac. (Couldn't resist it. =] ) I remember the day when he will be teasing me, but I was happy, because everything was simple back then. Until he went to Singapore and work. He seldom comes online, he might don't even care then, but he is part of my life. Oh ya, did I mention he teaches me Squash too?
I miss him.
The process of moving on has a significant side effect on myself, the hollowness. "It's a phase, Jun Haw." Esther had been telling me that like hundreds of times already. Of course, it's a phase, now what?
I miss people that made my life interesting, made it different, made it who I am today.
I miss Max, which is what I'd been calling him for years already. No, he is not gone. He just gone to Singapore. He is the one that exposed me to the Adobe Photoshop program and because of him, I got almost full marks for all of the event graphic design projects. And he is the reason, I got into the design department for the event project. And he is going to be the reason I ended up in the creative field. The time where he was sitting in front of the computer, in a pro shop in Lake View Club where we both were working part time there, he will be like: "Want to learn how to do this?" I will be running to the computer by then. The steps are fuzzy, the memories aren't. Max is 9 years older than me if I still remember it clearly, it feels real good when he's around, as I never had an elder brother before. Able to learn and depend on someone is something I never got a chance to experience it before.
I remember the day when he needs to get something somewhere and he had only a manual car to use which he not used to it. The ride was bumpy, but it was different that any other ride with parents. I remember the day when his girlfriend argued with him in a car, he turned around and said:"Jun Haw, you want my laptop? It is yours now." after her girlfriend shut his phone, he wanted to jump off the car apparently, I nodded my head, real hard as his laptop is a Mac. (Couldn't resist it. =] ) I remember the day when he will be teasing me, but I was happy, because everything was simple back then. Until he went to Singapore and work. He seldom comes online, he might don't even care then, but he is part of my life. Oh ya, did I mention he teaches me Squash too?
I miss him.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
The Wait is Over!
I finally finished my finals.
And watched 3 different movies every single day during the exam.
I shall review them later.
I got 2 and a half weeks of holiday, I'm gonna make sure here is going to shower with fireworks.
Anticipation is painful.
=)
And watched 3 different movies every single day during the exam.
I shall review them later.
I got 2 and a half weeks of holiday, I'm gonna make sure here is going to shower with fireworks.
Anticipation is painful.
=)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)