The Other Side

Weekend

2012-02-11T20:29:00.001+08:00

I understood the longing for the weekend recently, especially when you are trapped in the traffic jam for 5 days in the row.

The feeling is so great, to be able to wake up without the need of alarm clock and to be able to travel without the excessive number of cars on the road.

It is just that, the weekend feels awfully short in comparison.

What Would My 3D World be with LG Optimus 3D?

2012-02-09T20:46:00.002+08:00

I am not quite sure what to expect, seriously.

It seems like LG had recently launched the LG Optimus 3D being one of the first 3D phones in the market which definitely revolutionized the entire mobile experience. Given the look at it, LG does not appear to be idle watching at the whole war between Samsung, iPhone, HTC and Blackberry. When they launch a phone, it better be good. Honestly I was pretty disappointed with the previous LG Ice Cream phone that I used during my 1 year student exchange program over there at Korea itself. The interface was difficult to navigate, the keys were hard to press and the screen is bloody small.

Well, of course, it had been 2 years since then. LG had nothing in their range of products which could impress me, other than the fridge which they do all so well.

And now, this?! A phone without the need of the 3D glasses? I am not quite sure whether I seen a TV without the need of the glasses yet. Seriously, I am diggin' this phone if the battery could actually last longer than this HTC Desire that I am using it right now. It's like bringing your laptop in your pocket now, isn't it? The problem is that, you have to bring along with your chargers to stay connected with the world.

But screw this, imagine Temple Run running on this phone.

Oh wait, [insert desperate face here].

Just Go

2012-02-03T16:58:00.004+08:00

Life had been good, it had been really good and it should stay that way.
Things got complicated when people are being blinded by society’s perception of how you should live and they began to act like a self centered and egoistic bastards. One idiot triggers the rest around him to become just like him, because it is just not advantageous enough to be kind and good anymore. It escalated like a snow ball and the world stopped at its feet as the people living inside stop being themselves. Living zombies, trying to survive, were thinking that they are actually alive.

Being alive is more than that, it’s about being yourself and experiencing life at its best. One needs to remove himself from the cycle, stop taking advices from the social conventions and truly live to experience another place, people and things around you. Don’t think so much, escape from the seat of death and give yourself a change to see, feel and experience. Life is so much more than that, please do not ever restrict yourself at the very same spot, telling yourself that it is impossible or worst still, you cannot do it. Go travel, just pack your bag and go. Let yourself breathe and take a random chance, who knows what awaits you and you might discover something that you never thought you will. Do something that scares you, it's okay to be afraid. But trust me, it feels SO good when you conquered it all.

Give yourself a chance and just go.

Stop giving yourself excuses and try to rationalize a reason to go. Remove from the cycle, remove from the familiar places around you, remove from people that you love, just for a little while. No problem, there are WiFi everywhere anyways. Take lots of pictures, take a random leap, take an exciting trip.

Just go.

Internship

2012-02-02T20:58:00.000+08:00

It seems like I'm stuck in a constant position, fully exploited with minimum wages. The desire to run away is so great that I doubted myself again. Had been through this, why can't I just go all out? It's just a telephone. True, I might not be learning anything at all for the time being, but I believe human relationship might be a different investment all together. Well, it seems like what I say is not important and required. Am I going to shut up and just let it go? Will I learn at the end of the day? I am not quite sure, but what I know is that I will not let myself give up just like that. It will all work out fine, it will. I believe it will because it is all about perceptions anyway. I don't have to be unhappy and I don't have to make myself miserable. I don't have to.

Serenity

2012-01-26T12:08:00.001+08:00

It's so quiet.

The holiday feels like a reason to rest for everyone in the city, I suppose most of them went back to their respective hometown and some of them might even take this opportunity and went on a trip elsewhere. Looking at the speed of the leftover cars on the road, I figuratively can feel how lazy the drivers were, of course due to the festive seasons.

But, isn't the festive seasons suppose to fill with celebrations and joy, where people are excited and anticipating the celebrations? It is so awkwardly quiet here in Subang Jaya.

I put on my mp3 player and submerge myself in the music.

To feel alive.

CNY Holidays

2012-01-20T13:12:00.001+08:00

It's almost here, the long awaited Chinese New Year holidays.

Fortunately for me, the holiday is exceptionally long. Today will be the official commencement on the holiday for a good ol' 7 days. Will be experimenting lomography during this festive season, hopefully can try something completely different time time around.

And of course, not to get fat but get lots of ang pau during the Chinese New Year.

a cup of teh tarik

2012-01-15T18:22:00.001+08:00

The cup slammed on the table, spilling over some teh tarik on the square aluminium table at the corner of the mamak stall, instantly killed the conversation between the party of three. The night had obviously heated up especially it is 1am in the morning. He is furious, over a remark based on the oversimplification of assumptions made by the society. He felt judged not only by the other party, but simultaneously placed under the the pressure of the social conventions forcefully. And we all know how assumptions led us into an generalisation of things around us, allowing us to think less and process less information. But this is usually the answer to all the hate and anger all over the places. He wanted to allow his emotions to take over but took a deep breath in time and held back for a moment.

He stood up and attempted to leave this ugly place, leave this shallow conversation and most importantly leave this ignorant and irresponsible person. His other friend on his left pressed him down to his original seat, trying to calm him down regardless the consequences. He shrugged both of his friend's hand off his shoulders and only to realise that almost a quarter of his teh tarik was all over the table, threatening to flow down the edge of the table anytime. His friend quickly took three, four pieces of the tissue paper of the tissue box on the next table behind him and stopped the stream of teh tarik flowing towards both of them. He pushed his chair backward by a couple of inches, crossed his arms in front of him and laid back on the metal chair, signalling an obvious "I disagree with whatever you said" body language to the rest of the audiences.

He still cannot believe for a second that his once "friend" actually said that.

He looked over to the quiet street, avoiding glances from everyone in the same table and shook his head in disbelief for a moment there. The moon was very bright and the night sky was clear, a perfect time for a gathering of friends a la the Malaysians style. Yet, there were only 8 cars at the parking spaces which explained the small crowd in the mamak stall despite located right beside the city center. He took another deep breath in and shifted his seating position, crossing his right leg over his left. He decided to give the silent treatment for the rest of the night until they all decided that this conversation will not go anywhere and head home respectively. Or rather until, the other party apologies, whichever comes first.

"That's rather harsh, don't you think?" his friend spoke up while taking a sip of his cup of teh tarik. "But it's the fact!" The opposition finally spoke for the first time after all the drama originated from his remark. He swing both his arm open while giving a puzzled look on his eyebrows and took big gulp of his cup of teh tarik, taken back over the direct confrontation from both of his friends, trying to mask his nervousness while leaving his drink barely over half left in the cup. This clearly was not going to end there and then, the other party did not expect any of this to happen.

He sighed. His could not stand it anymore and broke his vow to remain silent the rest of the night. He swiftly pulled his chair towards the table and glared at the other party intensely. "Not on this sort of subjective matters, no." He pointed at the other party's nose with his right index finger when he said that. "Just because you believe so, doesn't mean the rest of the world have to believe the same damn thing!" he raised his tone and slammed the table the second time with his right palm on the corner of the table. He almost screamed but managed to control his raging emotions.

He was mad at himself for not being able to control his emotions with the fist he was clenching so hard but he was still even angrier for the narrow viewpoint from the other party demonstrated through the statement just now. He took a quick sip of teh tarik and placed the cup nearer to the center of the table as a precaution to avoid any potential spilling hazards due to the unstable emotional state of his. His friend who is still sitting right next to him quickly gave him a pat on his shoulder, even though he knew it for a fact that it might not work at all to calm his friend down given that the personality of his friend being short tempered but never, ever, unreasonable. It is true that even if the majority in the society perceive life and the connotations behind everything else around them does not prove or justify it as the ultimate truth. Assuming the rest of the world works in such a simplistic manner is just being ignorant and irresponsible or even naive to begin with. On this very table, the concept of majority simply just do not work.

"That's like saying all birds can fly, no?" His friend quickly added before the conversation will end up in an argument and will result in damaged friendships not to mention it will not solve any problems at hand. He leaned forward and added "Yeah, try convincing gay people that they are actually straight because they are confused at that moment in life." sarcastically and rolled his eyes. He and his friend by his side both held their teh tarik up at the same time and drank a mouthful down his throat.

"This is absurdity, these are completely different cases!" it seems like the other party could not hold it any longer too. Something is definitely in line and his friend can smell the pungent gunpowder in the conversation now. When both parties are submerged in emotions like anger, no one wins in the end. It is not like his friends had never seen this before and he is always the one trying to fix this. It is almost habitual and he will never understand how these two people with such distinct differences in the perception of life could be friends for the past 10 years. It just does not make sense at all, but it is right in front of his eyes and it is going to happen all over again. By then, both of them had already stood up and yes, it is going to happen all over again.

"Stop it, you two!" His friend stood up immediately and took over like a referee. For the effort of continuous diplomatic relationship between the conflicting parties for the past decade, his friend could one day possibly be nominated for the Nobel Peace Award. "He got a point, now sit." his friend pointed at the chair and he quietly followed the instruction. "But that does not mean that you are right. You, sit down," his friend pointed at the other chair, instructing the other party to do the same. "I don't believe this, seriously. How many times had we been through these and you guys are still arguing over the same thing over and over again? Don't you guys feel sick and tired over these?" His friend buried his face in his left palm and shook his head in disappointment. "Can't you guys tolerate and come into a compromise? You know arguing won't take us anywhere and this is not the first time for all of us," his friend added and glared at both of them. He took his cup from the table and drank. "But you know about compromise: they never solve a problem, they merely an approach to temporarily dissolve conflicts at hand!" he said and continued to sip on his teh tarik.

"It's not like we would ever come into a conclusion or be able to justify which of the alternatives are valid." his friend added while looking over to the other party, attempting to obtain agreement. The other party said nothing and nodded because he knew the consequences of the statement he made all along, yet he let his ego take over the conversation, thus leading to this pointless and heated conversation. He knew for a fact that perceptions differ among people but he believes strongly to the appeal of the populations. He still insist on the greatest number of acceptance being the greatest possibility of fact since if it wasn't true, acceptable or believable, no one will adopt the same perceptions or vantage points. In fact, the trigger of the chain of events is so insignificant right now and it is all fueled by the egoistic mindset of human being, escalated by the narrow observations and ignorant assumptions made by oneself. Ego blinded the people and everyone is trying to be the right one - to be the one in power. The other party wants to be in the right and he insisted that he himself is right backed up by the power of the majority. But it is true that it does not have to be a staple for everyone else in the world as it is a matter of choices and being responsible with the choices you had made or about to make.

He leaned back to the back of his chair. He knew that there is no potential methods or evidences to justify the premises in order provide a valid conclusion to please both parties. It is almost like proving the existence of god to resolve the argument between the Christians and the scientists. He knew that this is just a futile attempt, trying to go against subjective opinions like these. But he just could not tolerate people like his "friend" acting all so arrogant and denying all other possibilities. He realised that he essentially argued because of the personality of the other party, not due to the arbitrary topic itself. By the end of the day, the clock stroke three and he extended his hand to the other party. All of them lifted their cups and downed the rest of the content. They had apologized to each other and left the mamak stall with arms over the other two friends' shoulders.

And the three empty cups are left on the table at the corner of the mamak stall.

Internship Application

2012-01-13T22:08:00.006+08:00

April sent in my resume to a company this morning.

I woke up and saw it immediately as the email was cc-ed to me too. Around 11am in the morning, when I was still all groggy since I just woke up, an unknown caller calling me on my phone. Puzzled, I picked up the phone and a lady was speaking her company's name and her position, then told me that she saw my resume and was wondering whether I can attend the interview today.

Honestly, I am not sure what's going on.

I sent April a copy of my resume so that she could use her power of networking and get me a potential internship position. April had been really efficient, a bit too efficient that I basically have no clue or whatsoever on the companies that she had sent to. When the lady over the phone was talking, there was this large grey cloud over my head. Wasn't even sure how to react with the questions for a moment there.

I proceed to ask for the office location and her name. The rest? Ask April lah. Apparently, this Success Resources deals with seminars that are of my interest and I just went for the interview on 2.30pm. Thankfully for John, the marketing manager for not being harsh on me and took me in despite the short period of internship. Or maybe it's because of the low salary exception that I wrote. This is also the very first interview that someone asked me: "Do you read books? What's the last book you read?" Luckily I was reading Payback Time in mandarin. HAHAHA!

It's the experiences that count, no? That's why it is called an internship. I tried to not assume anything and learn whatever that I could in the meantime. I am glad enough, really. And I start on Monday.

Thanks, April.

오늘밤은 어둠이 무서워요 (I am afraid of the dark tonight) - 10cm

2012-01-11T16:06:00.000+08:00

오늘밤은 혼자 있기가 무서워요
(Being alone tonight is scary.)
창문을 여니 바람소리가 드세요
(Please open the window and listen to the sound of the wind.)
사람들은 나를 보살펴 주지 않어
(Others do not want to care about me.)
잠들 때까지 날 떠나지 말아줘요
(Till I fell asleep, please don't leave me.)

꾸물거리는 저기 벌레를 잡아줘요
(Please catch the bugs that are messing with me.)
잡은 휴지는 꼭꼭구겨 창문 밖에 던져 버려줘
(Crumple the tissue paper that you caught it with and throw it outside the window.)
오늘의 나는 절대 결코 강하지 않어
(Today I’m just not strong at all.)
그냥 오늘밤만 네게 안겨서
(Just tonight, please hug me.)
불러주는 자장노래 들을래
(and sing me a lullaby and put me to sleep.)

오늘밤은 혼자 잠들기 무서워요
(Sleeping alone tonight is scary.)
저기 작은 방에 무언가 있는 거 같어
(It seems like there's something in my small room.)
잠깐만요 나 원래 이런 사람 아냐
(Wait a minute, I'm originally not a person like this.)
잠들 때까지 집에 가지 말아줘요
(Till I fell asleep, please don't go home.)

혹시 모르니 저기 대문을 잠가줘요
(I'm not sure, but could you lock the front gate?)
들어 올 때는 불을 끄고 방문을 반쯤 열어줘
(When you head back, please turn off the light and leave the room door slightly open.)
오늘의 나는 절대 결코 강하지 않어
(Today I’m just not strong at all.)
그냥 오늘밤만 네게 안길래
(Just tonight, please hug me.)

혹시나 내가 못된 생각 널 갖기 위해 시꺼먼 마음
(If for whatever reason, there is this evil thoughts or a blackened heart in order to have you,)
의심이 된다면 저 의자에 나를 묶어도 좋아
(you suspected, it's okay to tie me to that chair.)
창밖을 봐요 비가 와요
(Look outside the window, the rain is falling.)
지금 집에 가긴 틀렸어요
(It might be a bad idea to go home now.)
버스도 끊기고 여기까진 택시도 안와요
(The bus had stopped and the taxi don't come here often.)

오늘밤은 혼자 있기가 무서워요
(Being alone tonight is scary.)
잠들 때까지 머릿결을 만져줘요
(Till I fell asleep, please keep stroking my hair.)
믿어줘요 나 원래 이런 사람 아냐
(Please believe me, that I am not originally a person like this.)
그냥 오늘밤만 네게 안겨서
(Just tonight, please hug me.)
불러주는 자장 노래 들을래
(And sing to me a lullaby and put me to sleep.)
제발 오늘밤만 가지 말아요
(Please, for tonight, don't go.)

Note: Love the rhythm of this song, and the simple lyrics which conveyed the emotions really clearly. Allowing guys to show a soft side of themselves, putting down ego and perceptions from the society and allow themselves to be loved, even if it's for a night only. I think I translated correctly, might have some lost of meaning here and there but essentially this is what the song wanted to convey. =)

Result?

2012-01-09T17:05:00.001+08:00

When will our result be released?

Sepang Gold Coast

2012-01-08T18:47:00.001+08:00

It's been awhile, a spontaneous trip like this, away from the city life and hid under a chalet which was (and I believe still is) infested by mosquitoes. We went to Sepang Gold Coast, we as in Esther, Sharon, Calvin and myself to a beach where the sea is not correctly colored and I shall not complain further.

The getting together part was really good, except the RM120 spent on the entire trip which include alcohol. And of course, what do we do there even when we are told not do? Enjoy hard drinks (minuman keras). Still not liking for a bit, cannot comprehend the concept drinking awfully tasted drink to achieve temporary state of reduced inhibitions but I worked around it. Confession and awkward daring games while quite amazed by the fact that we only played one round of citadel, the night eventually turned sentimental and quiet.

True, nothing will last forever.

But at least I'm making the best out of everything, no? I don't ask for much, please do remember me and give a nod when we walk past each other on the opposite side of the road. Who are we do judge what will happen in the future, what I can only do is to make sure I appreciate every single moment of togetherness.

I think it comes with age, the whole enlightenment of life. Despite how much I am trying to avoid being called "old for my age" but I couldn't help it. Besides, it's rational and logical once you placed them into their respective positions. I will never assume that I know anything or that I am right in all situations. I shall place ego aside and acknowledge the rest of the populations, however shallow or bias the opinion would be. Of course, I don't have to agree nonetheless.

It'a a phase, I suppose. Just like the sunset that we witness over the deck (regardless how much mosquitoes that are at the same place which I resorted to eating at the weirdest position ever), things have to come and go. Maybe that's the whole reason for people to perceive it as beautiful and important, because they all do not last.

I will definitely miss this moment.

The very same time next year, it might be just two of us left out of the original four. Quietly fighting for a position to be recognized and appreciated. Trying to live life at the fullest while keeping the capitalists happy. ~~Hopefully,~~ Calvin and Esther will do well in their masters degree program, I am pretty sure. Who knows that if things work out well, probably we could have a better trip all the way to Japan and UK. Given the current financial situation, it's still nice to think about the possibilities of these opportunities.

Tsk, life.

UK Summer Program - Lancaster

2012-01-04T13:36:00.003+08:00

We have an opportunity to participate in a summer program all the way at Lancaster, UK early next year. It's like doing electives at UK and I'm really diggin' the idea. 3 months in UK? I guess I could finish London and some other cities like Mancaster or even Glasgow to find my childhood friend. I'm excited, very excited.

But there's this one problem, money. That had been a problem ever since I want to do anything, and frankly, I can't really do anything about it. If I really want this to happen, I would have to do something about it, i.e. save money, a lot of money and work whenever I can. By doing this I would be jeopardizing my new year resolutions but I will not tolerate too much compromise on both the life time objective and resolutions for this year.

I will proceed to accomplish all the resolutions that involve physical and mental development. However, things that would require significant financial support might have to wait for next year. I will do my handstand, I will workout as much as possible and I will hike that bloody hill. Diving license and travel to the foreign country thing might have to wait. Not that I don't want to do it, I have to delay it for the greater benefits.

I am absolutely thrilled with the opportunity to go to UK.

And I am not letting it go. Heard it from a friend that RM10k would be more than enough to backpack at UK. I guess I have to at least have RM7.5k at the end of the year to ensure a slight possibilities on this plan.

I'm going to UK and I am readjusting my new year resolutions:

1. to be able to do a handstand - on both hands, without assistance of wall
2. weight training to obtain more muscle mass - to be able to wear tank top with nice muscle definition on arms and shoulders and chest AND lose fat for six pack abs - along side with tkd bootcamp training
3. 120kg deadlift, 100kg squat and 75kg bench press.
4. 6 arts project - at least 2 major projects
5. climb a mountain / hills including broga or tahan AND white water rafting - self explanatory
6. take Korean language test - attempt level 4
7. Read one book every month
8. Blog every week.
9. save money - RM10,000 via teaching, freelance event / creative jobs and part time jobs.
10.Self-learn Guitar
11. Maintain 75 average for degree.
12. Learning something new this year - something that I am unaware of or inexperience on.

2012 - The Beginning of the Resolutions

2012-01-01T14:38:00.001+08:00

Was working on an event during the countdown event at Red Carpet Avenue near Sunway Giza. When the clock stroke 12am, when the crowd cheered, when I was standing under the fireworks, it was 2012 already. Honestly, I don't see the joy or the sorrow that was created for the past year. I guess, I did not experience enough, something that I could possibly realized while talking with Sharon.

I had been productive last year.

Not that I haven't, completed all 11 of the resolutions which includes working out, graduating with distinction, obtaining diving license and going to a cave. This year around, I would own 2012 all over again, over and over again while making sure I would be able make 2012 a better year. Setting up 12 resolutions this year which I will make sure I will complete them and mark against some friends of mine who are ready to take up the challenge. Whoever loses, pays for dinner PER RESOLUTION.

This year around, I will:

1. travel to a country - foreign country with different language and cultural background
2. weight training to obtain more muscle mass - to be able to wear tank top with nice muscle definition on arms and shoulders and chest AND lose fat for six pack abs - along side with tkd bootcamp training AND to be able to do a handstand - on both hands, without assistance of wall
3. take Korean language test - attempt level 4
4. 6 arts project - at least 2 major projects
5. diving advance license - at pulau redang or equilavant AND climb a mountain / hills including broga or tahan AND white water rafting - self explanatory
6. to construct a home gym - equipped with pull up bar and gymnastic rings
7. Read one book every month
8. taking guitar class - and be able to play three songs
9. save money - RM2,000 to be exact via teaching, freelance event or creative jobs and part time jobs.
10. Blog every week.
11. Maintain 75 average for degree.
12. Learning something new this year - something that I am unaware of or inexperience on.

Mini Goals: ‎120kg deadlift, 100kg squat and 75kg bench press by end of the year!

Who's up with the challenge can always leave a comment. XD

I'll Be Your Man

2011-12-30T22:00:00.000+08:00

I'm enjoying this very very much. So much, I'm going to sing in mandarin!

[Verse 1]
Too many voices, too many noises
Invisible wires keeping us apart
So many choices, but there all disappointments
And they only seel me away from you
Climb into our own private bubble
Lets get into all kinds of trouble

[Chorus]
Slide over here let your hands feel the way
Theres no better method to communicate
Girl stop your talking words just get in the way
I'll be your man
So baby come over, from the end of the sofa
I'll be your man
I'll be your man

[Verse 2]
So many faces, staring at their shoe laces
When only one wants to be seen
So tonight lets be honest, we all want to wanted
And darling your got me wanting you
Everything that I'm trying to say
Just sounds like a warn out cleeshay

[Chorus]
Slide over here let your hands feel the way
Theres no better method to communicate
Girl stop your talking words just get in the way
I'll be your man
So baby come over, from the end of the sofa
I'll be your man
I'll be your man

[Verse 3]
Were all what your looking for
Someone we just can't ignore
Its real love drippin' from my heart
You've got me trippin'
Were all what your looking for...

[Chorus]
Slide over here let your hands feel the way
Theres no better method to communicate
Girl stop your talking words just get in the way
I'll be your man
So baby come over, from the end of the sofa
I'll be your man
I'll be your man

(Slide over here) Slide over here let your hands feel the way
Theres no better method to communicate (Slide over here)
Girl stop your talking words just get in the way
I'll be your man
So baby come over, from the end of the sofa
I'll be your man
I'll be your man
I'll be your man
I'll be your man
I'll be your man
I'll be your man

After Midnight

2011-12-22T02:54:00.003+08:00

I had been sleeping really late recently.

Right after my final exams, I am sleeping at 5am and wake up after noon the very next day. This is a screwed up biological sleeping pattern, yet it is all because I started to like the serenity and peace that I could have during wee hours. The pace slows down and I could feel the world on the top on my fingertips. Looping Dido's song at the background, I started reading articles and writing blog posts all over again.

I had found the motivation to actually write down stuff.

Perhaps I am trying to leave some tracks, a desperate attempt and frail struggle to exist or at least, try to exist. I wonder since when it began, when things around me seem to have a lot more impact on me. Relationships between people and the things I did became an epitome of my life. Maybe that's why I am starting with all these resolutions completion project which includes 12 self improvement resolutions to be completed within 365 days. List goes all the way from, exercising to taking a guitar lesson.

This is sad, no? Trying to think that I had a direction and attempting to achieve my lifetime goals while experiencing life at its best when in fact I am just like everyone else, lost in the sea of people, wondering around with no sense of purpose. Not to mention the occasional realization of the shallowness of the world and the materialistic side of the society. Please do not allow me to come in contact with people who are suicidal inclined, they might just suicide there and then after 5 minutes of conversation with me.

But the best thing is? I won't, because I am still believing in possibilities, of things happening or the complete opposite. It makes me feel like a complete hypocrite, living with an unknown mask in front of my face, trying to fit in ALL the time.

This is so tiring.

If there's one day when financial freedom is achieved, I would submerge myself in arts and expressions. Maybe I will make music, maybe I will make movies, maybe I will runaway and travel around the world. Allowing myself to disappear from the surface of the world for awhile, not like it matters anyway. I will stand under the Eiffel Tower, I will lie on the beach at Bali, I will ski at Hokkaido, Japan, I will paint my life with experiences that I never thought I would encounter.

The harsh truth of life has to get in the way, tearing dreams apart and leaving life pointless. Capitalist and materialist ideologies had constantly insisting that it's not okay to do what you want because one needs to work and and earn money to enjoy life as it is. We are meant to work, that's what they say. And make us richer. that's what they didn't say. It might be wise to know that you are able identify these ideologies at play in our society, yet the society still perceive you as a person who is in denial and refusing to accept the social order.

Frustrating much.

Am I going to feel content doing what I like but leaving a trace? Or merely contributing to the social order? I guess it's going to be a long night, tonight.

Dido - Life for Rent

2011-12-19T15:20:00.000+08:00

The feeling so complicated inside, when this song was played over the radio. It feels so... empty, deep inside. The sense of belonging rendered, invalid.

Maybe that's exactly why I constantly wants to run away, from everything else. Questioning the matter of love and despair and rationalizing life. But if my life is for rent, I think the rental shouldn't be high, as of I do not have much furniture inside. One day, maybe one day, I would meet someone that would understand the various sizes of pictures and photos I hung all over the house. Everything I had, everyone that I had met, seems like a phase, a passage of water which will eventually pass, nothing I have is truly mine. I'm just very sentimental.

Maybe that's because I had never strong enough to stick long enough to associate with the people and the things around me. I had grown too lazy to tolerate and entertain drama among the society. Sure, dissociating with it painful, but my laziness always win. I will regret the very next day, and will proceed with my life, trying to be better than tomorrow.

The concept of life is too vague.

No one knows how to live, they only think they know how to live. Don't judge me with your standards, everyone is trying their best to live life.

Thinking Skills

2011-12-13T20:04:00.001+08:00

Never expected thinking skills can be assessed through final exam. It was so agonizing to see one question worth forty marks. I don't support I could expect anything for this exam, hopefully the rest of the subject could pull the average up.

Is it even fair to judge thought?

In what case the thought process is deemed right? Based on majority's perception on things? In what sense is my thought is assumed as wrong? Or the context in which I am judged upon?

Thinking is subjective, no?

Maybe I'm just giving excuses for the potential disastrous result ahead.

Blogging via Mobile

2011-12-13T00:48:00.001+08:00

This is a test post from mobile.

走鋼索的人

2011-11-28T03:42:00.001+08:00

林宥嘉 - 走鋼索的人

走在半空中

要人命的風

就快要把我吹落

你在那一頭

說你不愛我

我掛在風裡顫抖

走鋼索的人不害怕犧牲

只求你一句愛我

往前是解脫後退是自由

我應不應該回頭

風吹痛我雙眼我看不清楚

我平衡不了躲在我心裡的苦

我要給你幸福你蠻不在乎

你愛不愛我會決定我下一步

往前是冷漠

後退是寂寞

乾脆我墜落

回憶在左手

未來在右手

誰又會同情我

Remember

2011-11-27T23:05:00.001+08:00

Went back to Melaka today, to see my grandma.

She couldn't recall my name.

Neither with my sisters' and even my mother's name. This scares me, have to accept the fact that there will be one day when I will not be able to remember my own name, where I came from and where I would ultimately want to go.

It's scary to know that I will not remember myself, one day.

What am I suppose to do, when I am sitting there merely waiting for my time to go? Will I wait, or would I choose to just go? Will I see the point to exist and occupy space, would I be able to remember as much as possible? The faces that I love, the places that I went, the things I did and the experiences that I would want to remember.

What am I suppose to do?

Coming to an End

2011-11-26T23:02:00.001+08:00

It's scary.

The thought of time passing on so fast. It feels like yesterday when I came back from Korea. It feels like yesterday when I had my first 20 weeks internship in a multinational advertising firm. It feels like yesterday when I graduated from my diploma with distinction. It feels like yesterday when I applied for the degree program. And semester one is coming to an end after the finals from 5th to the 16th of December. Soon, very soon.

Time has no mercy, it just keeps on going. Regardless what you may had decided to do, to stay or to progress. To this very point, I felt like I am not maximizing the time and productivity of my life's direction. It's never enough, it's always too many things to do and oh-so-little-time.

I have so many tasks on my to-do-list. It's very scary, when I realize that this year is coming to an end. I still have dreams to live, and life to dream on. I refuse to sit on it and not do anything about it. To achieve something, 3 crucial resources are required: human resource, time and money. I am the human resource, and I need to fully utilize my time. Am I going to allow money to restrict myself? I am afraid that I am doing so right now.

I want to runaway.

I had been saying this for quite some time already. I had been staying in Subang Jaya for a little but more that 2 decades. I need and I desire to expand my horizon, to see, to learn and to experience. Let me run, let me escape to a place that I might not know, that I might not understand. Let me fall, let me learn from the mistakes that I made throughout my life, throughout my existence. Let me experience, let me grow from the things I see, the things I learn and the things that I am about to experience.

I will be responsible to myself, and the choices I made and will make in the future.

I am not sure whether I will be fine, whether I will be rich, whether I will be a better person (or not). I had drew up my map and lay it on the table, telling myself: just allow myself to do so. Please be fine. Please be okay. I hope, I sincerely hope so.

I learned a lot and even met a lot of new friends. Having new friends like Shinta, Edwin and Isaiah from the degree course in Sunway had brighten up the road and journey we are about to take. Maybe, just maybe 10 years later, we would be sitting on the same table again, laughing about the assignments we had over a cup of coffee, or chocolate. It would be fine, it should be okay at the end of the day. I hope, I sincerely hope so.

It's almost the end of 2011.

It's time to clean up the mess and be a little bit more productive then the year before. A little bit more determined than the year before. And, a little bit more grateful than the year before.

Thank you, world.
Thank you, friends.
New or Old.

Thank you, I truly know what I suppose to do now.

Starbucks的Hot Caramel Chocolate

2011-11-16T21:04:00.001+08:00

我其实很享受Starbucks的Hot Caramel Chocolate.

那一个雨后的晚上，

那一杯暖暖的饮料。

喝下，100%纯正天然的幸福。

坐在一个角落的风景其实还不赖。

在看着人来人往，稀里哗啦。

无所事事的心情，好久不见。

那杯饮料，其实很甜。不，非常甜。

我妹妹拿起杯子，

喝下了一大口。

然后，转身离开。

明天是SPM数学考试，整大半的店里都是学生。

正在奋斗的学生。

我在这里的原因，

全都是因为她的。

我真的真的好怀恋，

这种好简单的感觉。

这种好简单的关系。

人与人的人际关系。

相互相承的存在着。

好久不见。

我想，我真的脱节了。

Religion

2011-10-09T00:41:00.000+08:00

2011-10-07T15:54:00.001+08:00

有你在的地方一定有欢笑，你善良，调皮，任性，霸道与贴心。你看起来活泼好动，但实际内心深处，你有些自卑而自负，你希望自己能把事情做到最好，你很在乎别人对你的评价，你的性格像小孩，单纯直接，情绪化，喜怒哀乐写在脸上，你没有心机，但也缺少些自我保护的能力，你表面看来很容易相处，但想要走进你的内心世界其实并不容易，你需要人家的鼓励，包容，宠爱和肯定，其实你也常常自我反省，你希望自己能做到起码80%的完美，但你似乎没那个毅力，所以你的情绪变化无常，一定是被这些因素困扰的。

=(

I need to break away.

2011-10-06T15:14:00.000+08:00

I am studying for my thinking skills test tomorrow. The notes are like a 150 pages booklet filled with font size 9 wordings. I am paranoid, given the fact that I failed my Corporate Communication test the week before last. My mother came into my room and asked me: "You are studying?!" She had this sarcastic smile on her face.

I guess it had been awhile since I last studied. As a matter of fact, I had never did take my studies seriously before. No wonder she was smiling, mischievously. I, on the other hand, will not be pressured by her smile. Hence, I took my highlighter and continue to journey within the lines, stating my point.

It's true.

Since the commencement of the degree program, I am as my diploma coordinator, Mr. Liling called it: "stretched to the limit" for the very first time. Fair enough, diploma was a breeze for me. It was like a vacation. I learnt a lot, I do experienced a lot too. But, it wasn't study. It was merely knowing, doing and get over it. I had never buried my face into the textbooks, for that Esther had been complaining a lot. (Well, she is doing Degree after all.) I could afford to do assignment a night before the assignment due date. Life was good back then.

And of course, good things never lasted for long. "Welcome to degree life." I told myself. Before I know it, I am studying. Before I know what's going on, I failed my first test. Marvelous. On the mock presentation, I was told that my verbal skills in English is not up to par. Marvelous.

It was devastating.

Suddenly, the highest achiever's award from the diploma program does not mean anything anymore. It did not ensure and guarantee anything. I fell flat on the ground, face first and it hurts, a lot. Facing a bit of cultural shock in the group assignments, a bit of assessment shock in the first test and last but not least, a bit of language barriers trying to explain a point. To a certain extent, I suppose it's reasonable to conclude that my confidence level had been damaged severely. Or maybe I was just being too comfortable with the previous pattern adopted from the diploma program.

I need to break away.

抓沙

2011-10-04T00:59:00.000+08:00

“你知道抓沙的感觉吗？”我当时坐在厨房和饭厅之间的台阶上。

“沙，抓得住吗？”我妈妈把我明天要穿的西装裤裤脚上的线猛拉。我不知觉地也跟着抽了一下。

“那种你很想把它留下，但是它一直在指缝间溜走的感觉。”我看着妈妈又拉又剪的。

妈妈没有答复我，继续拉扯着线。我想她已经明白了，完完全全的明白了。

我回去房间内，把我已经不能穿的裤子，全部都从衣橱里一件一件的拿出来。留不住的，就不可能留住的。该过去的，就应该让它好好的去。

“勉强是不会快乐的。”这句话我不知道听过多少遍了。电视上，书本上，朋友口中，在我脑海里荡漾的这句话。

明天我去实习了，必须在社会大学里待上五个月的时间。如果勉强是没有快乐的，我可以不去实习吗？如果世界上有那么多选择的话，我想谁都不想勉强自己去做自己不快乐的事。如果事情可以那么简单的话，没有人会活得不快乐了。

如果可以有那么多的如果，就不会有那么多的遗憾了。

也不知道从什么时候开始，我常常望着天空发呆。蓝蓝的天空，挂着白云朵朵，可能这就是我向往的生活吧！无忧无虑的，无牵无挂。但是，天空若没有太阳，月亮和星星的陪伴下，会显得特别的孤单。

不管你如何期待永久的晴天，你其实自己早都已经知道，你的期待，只能够永远的保留在期待的位子。刮风，下雨，阴沉都是免不了的。真的免不了的。变化是你无法改变的事实，改变不了的事实，又何必伤脑筋改变呢？

发呆也会让人有所领悟的。

或许，可能这只是或许，我可以依然在环境的摧残下，微笑着迎接明天的一切可能。

快乐很简单，简单到人们都不认为快乐不单纯只是那么简单，那么容易得到的美好。所以人嘛，很难快乐。我很不幸的，也一样的沦落到这个快乐与悲伤中间的灰色地带。

什么来的？？

不就是不知道什么值得快乐，不知道什么应该悲伤的情感空虚。在这段日子里，我找不到微笑的理由，我想哭但是却哭不出来。

因为，我都抓不住手上的沙，留不住身边的人。

--- 3rd August 2010

Korea Trip

2011-08-13T21:14:00.005+08:00

All of the sudden, I went to Korea and participated Taekwondo competition. I am really sorry that I from the start to the end, am not satisfied of my performance. It just feel like I am not good enough, upon completion of the competition, it had further confirm my thoughts. I am not strong enough, not flexible enough, not good enough. Depressing? Yes. Motivating? Oh hell yes.

When you are exposed to stimuli or even confined in an area where everyone else's standard is THAT high, you have no choice but to improve. I don't want to call it eustress, I rather call it self-actualization. When you are informed that there are something better out there, what you have became worthless. As long as you are willing to do something about it, then it's all okay.

It's just a little overwhelming, honestly. To see other Taekwondo player perform their Side Kick all the way 170 to 180 degrees upward. According to the all mighty Master Park, Side Kick do shows the proficiency of a particular Taekwondo player in terms of the understanding of the motion all the way to the dedication and years put into the training. If 170 degree is normal, I think I barely passed. Doing that in Malaysia? I think you will earn respect from everyone 3rd Dan and below. Heck, even a master might not be able to do it too.

That looks like a direction to go.
At least 150 degree, come on!

Event Preparation

2011-08-05T23:40:00.000+08:00

It's been awhile since I last involved in the event preparation already.

I guess it had been a good 3 years since then. Today was the VU Freshie's Night which William is involved in the decoration. I was pretty beat up from the Taekwondo practice the day before, but was awaken by William's call at 9am. I dragged my half dead half blur body to the university. I suppose youngsters nowadays had never really involved in these activities much, thus allowing me to witness a lot of "whatever-nobody-can-see" attitude. Honestly, I am annoyed.

But what can I do? I am merely somebody who is not even belong to the committee and even the university. Just because that I studied event management does not change anything from the budget to the time management. That aside, it's quite painful and agonizing to see that even the Plan B (which I also did not quite like it) did not work well due to time constraint, which is obviously, due to the uninformed committees and slow moving work progress. I had even throw in my share of money into the material, seeing it falling apart does hurt, unfortunately.

Started 2 weeks before the event with limited manpower driving the decoration preparation, I had already foresee problems. Ah well, I guess it's the nature of event planning process. It's just that we have significantly low budget, significantly insufficient time due to insufficient manpower to drive the progress in the early stages of the event. External sponsorship not available as it was said to be saved for the next event, I was absolutely dumbfounded. I did expected more cardboard boxes, but I guess I'll just have to make do. Was suppose to make the jeans stopped in time, falling off the cardboard boxes, but we had just too little jeans and too little time.

Note to self, if were to conduct centerpiece production, opt for plywood with nails then paint it. If cost is still a major constraint and polystyrene is the only choice, start very early and bind pieces of polystyrene together with polystyrene glue or double sided tape and lots of PVA glue and allow it to dry thoroughly. Plaster require thorough drying too for maximum hardness which also indicate that we would have to start really early, 2 weeks is not reasonable. And of course, fishing lines with weights (wire gauze in this case), definitely something to be avoided after looking at the wounds all around the hands. It is possible to use multiple 5 liter oil container to add water for weights in cases of tower building and erections of graphic materials. Masking Tape works well during emergencies, remember to stock them up, lots of them.

I absolutely loved the ladder and theme item decoration, it was awesome. Hopefully I could get the picture from William and include it here, it was something really worth remembering. I am unable to stay back for the event due to Taekwondo training again, but hopefully everything is exactly how it looks like when I left the Multipurpose Hall, it's a bit late to say this, but I certainly hope the event did successfully changed peoples' perceptions towards event planning. It isn't all that easy, what you need is just time, money, manpower and lots of willpower and creative mind.

Of course, all in all, hopefully William could have a really good night sleep after this.

Running

2011-07-30T03:25:00.000+08:00

I had been doing a lot of things that I would never expect myself to do. For example, 12.3km run of Men Health, tonight. I mean for a person like me who hated running participating in a marathon, well, I would not say I am completely sane at the moment. I am not quite sure what am I trying to prove or what am I trying to convince. Maybe I am trying to prove something to myself. Maybe I am trying to make the best out of everything, maybe I am trying to run away. I would not completely deny the possibilities. Or maybe I just do not want to leave any regrets behind, probably all because of the fact that I was listening to a lot of talks recently and a lot dealt with perceptions.Or maybe I am just getting old. *Gasp*

"I will not try to be right, I choose to be happy." the speaker once said.

Am I happy? What am I suppose to do to feel happy? I started to question myself. It was used to be easy, I could be happy with a nice dinner, a simple gift, a short conversation, a simple trip or a insignificant accomplishment (real or virtual). But things had changed, I still feel happy nonetheless, but significantly less. My thoughts wonders back to the questions but it was completely futile. For some reason, I couldn't even give a definite answer to myself.

I am aware of my desire of learning which probably is a result for a constant feeling of incapability. Does this produce happiness? Apparently not. Learning is a choice to survive better, I need to learn and my rationale refuse to associate requirement with emotional satisfaction. And so, I am back to square one. I am also aware of my weird habit of jumping into new things, aka exploring new things, maybe that will be a credible source for happiness. I went diving, am I happy? Yes, accomplishment. I am running, will I be happy? Very likely, accomplishment. I guess that is exactly what I am going to do.

So yeah, I am going to run for 12.3km tonight at PutraJaya and I certainly hope that I could still feel my leg after that. *Cross Fingers*

I have a Tumblr!

2011-07-17T01:22:00.000+08:00

As the title suggested, I do have a Tumblr site for short and simple blog posts.

While this blog is reserved for heavy stuff. =P

Shall resume blogging really soon! XD

That's it, Diploma.

2011-07-13T13:24:00.032+08:00

I had finally completed my diploma, after 3 and a half years. It took me quite a while, with the cultural exchange to Korea for a year, it had already separated me from my original batch. Facing with a completely new batch of classmates when I came back for only 7 months, sad to say, I don't feel anything that I suppose to feel when I took my final paper on Exhibition Operation subject. Not a hint of happiness, nor sadness. I did my best throughout the entire diploma program, as I had never liked to be labelled as irresponsible. What I had done does not really seem to matter anymore once I proceed to a completely new degree. I could only hope that it would benefit be in terms of the awesomeness of the resume, but I do not feel regret completing this particular diploma of mine.

It did pull out some of the unknown personalities or characteristics of me which I also hope it would benefit me more when I progress into degree the very next month. By the time when I will be completing my degree, most of my friends would probably be working for 2 years or so already. Am I suppose to be worried? Am I suppose to be nervous about my choice of degree now? My dad, especially had made a big fuss of it. I am certainly aware that working experiences are the vital component in the future career pathway while education only works as a stepping stone so why waste time on this when you can finish it within 4 years. However, I refuse to tolerate inferior learning opportunities. Call that character, call that ignorant. I call that learning. After these long period of diploma, I certainly am exposed to various kind of people, challenges, responsibilities and opportunities. I believe it would do me good some time later. *cross fingers*

For the very first time, I am feeling absolute neutral.

伤风咳嗽

2011-04-13T09:29:00.001+08:00

不知道是怎么回事，突然又病了。

可能是空调的问题吧。

我不想去上课，但是卻不敢。谁知道可能不去的话，什么都不明白了。在这最后的一个学期，我不能妥协病假，也不能让自己病下去。

好沉重的头。

今天从八点上到五点，我还在犹豫。

Last Semester

2011-03-29T20:46:00.001+08:00

It's the last semester for me. For this last semester its about time for me to face the difficult subjects like law, economics and research methodology. Sigh.

The worst part is that I even have moral studies. Hello, community service.

Finals Week

2011-03-09T02:56:00.002+08:00

Here I am, in the middle of finals week, finishing the last short semester in my diploma.

Hopefully it will stay all good for the Management Accounting on Thursday, wish me luck. Need the marks to sustain my current average marks. =)

And I am refusing to sleep just yet, just to do completely nothing over the internet.

Short Semester

2011-02-21T23:06:00.001+08:00

is irritating.

2 more group assignments, 3 more accounting assignments. Due next week.

Sigh...

School Reopen

2011-01-20T13:58:00.001+08:00

It's been awhile since I go back to school. Suddenly there's a bunch of assignments to do. Human resource, imc and management accounting. Good luck to me and I shall disappear for a while to settle those works.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Korean bbq

2010-12-26T21:07:00.002+08:00

剩下的是

2010-12-20T15:15:00.000+08:00

时光匆匆，年尾了。
花开花落，一年了。
人聚人散，何时了。
悲欢离合，自嘲了。

带不走的，留下了。
留不了的，记下了。
记不起的，忘掉了。
忘不了的，放下了。

带走的，留下的，
记得的，忘记的，
和那些, 已经放下的，
还剩下的是，
站在你们面前的我。

Still Alive

2010-12-12T17:28:00.000+08:00

Yes, I am still alive.

After these few months of hiatus, I decided to take 30 minutes of my life, making it a little it more productive and informative.

It's been almost five months since I started my internship, and it's coming to an end next week. I am glad I did go through this internship experience despite that it did taken a toll on me. The whole travelling-to-KL-back-and-forth thingy, it's really frustrating and irritating.

Apart from that, I am pretty glad that I chose G2 to execute my internship program.

Life is full of surprises, especially when you decided to allow yourself open to those possibilities. Upon completion of my internship, I am able to identify my weaknesses. What's being surprising to me is that, I have problems when it comes to verbal communication.

And the usual weaknesses, that I have to work on.

I guess I'll have to work harder.

邂逅

2010-10-18T16:14:00.000+08:00

你把忧伤画在眼角
我将流浪抹上额头
你用思念添几缕白发
我让岁月雕刻我憔悴的手
然后在街角我们擦身而过
漠然地不再相识

啊亲爱的朋友
请别错怪那韶光改人容颜
我们自己才是那个化装师.

Adam Lambert - Whataya Want From Me

2010-09-01T23:55:00.001+08:00

Eat

2010-08-23T09:54:00.002+08:00

I like to eat.

But now, I'm broke, all because of food.

=)

Working

2010-08-20T09:27:00.002+08:00

I guess when my time is completely occupied, there is nothing left for me to think about anymore. I realize that I cannot stop or rest for a moment, once there are time for me to do nothing, my brain will start to do unnecessary thinking. I suppose I prefer it to be like this, being occupied, being utilized, most of all, being purposeful. I survived, without internet for a timespan of two weeks. I realize that internet, ultimately is important but it doesn't mean as much anymore.

Because the purpose is not there anymore.

Until now, so many years down the road I came to realize that it was the people who make me want to go online, making me feel that going online is meaningful, because there will be people waiting for you and you are going to be a part of something.

But I guess it's not happening now.

Surprisingly, I took it quite well. And maybe it is all because of the internship or supervised work experience thing. For the 5 months duration, despite the fact that I am not liking this due to the whole fact that I have to wake up at 7am, and make sure I arrive there at 9am, and also the fact that Malaysia's public transportation's efficiency, which require me to be extremely patience with everything that is revolving around me, I think I have to get use to this "Working Zombie" lifestyle.

Oh well...

Shopping

2010-07-31T23:00:00.002+08:00

It's been a long long while since I went shopping.

The fact that I am going for internship made me went for this shopping trip anyway. Luckily it's currently the Mega Sales period, which allows me to take advantage of those 70% discounts (almost) everywhere. Button down shirts and slacks, certainly not my style, after I looked into my closet and realize I don't have all those stuff at all. This shows how casual am I, eh-heh-heh.

Subang Parade, check.
Sunway Pyramid, check.

Oh shit, shoes!

LOL Moment

2010-07-29T11:05:00.000+08:00

Million Dollars Photo

Taekwondo Teacher / Funny Friend - Korea

Genting

2010-07-28T21:57:00.004+08:00

Genting don't excite me as much already. Either it is because I am getting old, or maybe because I had been to better ones.

Woke up in awkward hours this morning to get ready for this day trip to Genting with Sharon, Calvin and Esther. Probably the last random long distance outings for now until my internship officially ends first. 6am and I felt like hell, got on to Sharon's car which was driven by Calvin. We attempted to go on LDP but the traffic jam would not allow us to do so. Then, we revert to NPE, paid toll, went through KL, and Wangsa Maju before entering the Gombak then Genting Highland's road.

We stopped at some mamak and ate breakfast. I ended with a VERY big plate of chicken fried rice and a VERY sweet Milo. Then, it was sugar rush all the way till we reach the final destination.

We headed to the outdoor theme park straightaway to avoid human jam which usually occur right after lunch. Finally get to play the go-kart, even though I got the slowest car that cannot accelerate properly. Then it was all the ones that will have a long queue later, like Cockscrew. After playing all those, we went and ate Pizza Hut. RM77 for 4 people set, talk about inflation and then we went to Ripley's Believe it or Not.

After that were Flume Ride and The Mining Train, then it was time to go.

We went for dinner at Sushi King, Sunway Pyramid after going through the traffic jam again at Federal Highway and now here I am, going to bed.

Good night, world.

Hello, G2

2010-07-27T18:54:00.000+08:00

I made it.

At least into G2. The next 5 months is completely new to me though. Apparently during the interview, one of senior, Lee Tien saw me. I guess this internship ain't going to be that bad.

Well, because of the interview this morning, I can't sleep again. Went to bed at 1am, it seems like telling myself that "I need to sleep." doesn't help at all. Finally slept around 2am and woke up at 5.30am.

I left the house at 7am, thinking KTM and Monorail going to give me hell, it did, but at least I arrived 2 hours before I suppose to meet up with the HR department. The monorail station is right outside Wisma Genting, and I thought I would need to spend time to find it.

So, I spend those extra time at KFC eating some weird breakfast wrap.

Around 10am, I went back to the company and met the HR department. Then, the head of that department. Then, the person that I will work under for the next 5 months. I thought that it would be very difficult to enter, since this is a big company after all. I was surprised that all of them ask so specific questions and then granted me this opportunity to intern inside.

Yeah, and they were so surprised to see me interning for 5 months.

Do you smoke?
No.
Do you drink?
No.
Do you mind working under alcohol and tobacco?
No.

Most direct and specific interview ever.

Hello, G2.
See you next week.

Durian Buffet

2010-07-26T23:20:00.000+08:00

I always wanted to go for one durian buffet.

And I did, just now, along with Sharon, Calvin and Esther. RM10 for kampung durians, eat all you can. According to the market survey analysts, they say in order to gain profit out of this, we need to eat 3 durians each and anything beyond that is pure profit.

So we ate 14. I think I would not want to see durian anymore until the next season.

Oh, tomorrow I have 2 interviews in a row. One in KL and one in Kelana Jaya. I hope I don't start to nose bleed in the interview room tomorrow.

*Cross Fingers*

Internship Interview

2010-07-23T12:42:00.003+08:00

Got three calls from my internship coordinator today. After shifting here and there, the companies that I applied for just said that they will get back to me and apparently that didn't even happen at all, despite I was so desperate to just confirm and get over this as quickly as I could. My internship is going to start next week and I still haven't got accepted in any company yet.

My coordinator told me to attend an interview next Tuesday at 3.00pm, even though that wasn't the company I applied for. I just want to get over and done with it.

Please.

Bumpy

2010-07-20T00:38:00.000+08:00

Guess that when you get back into life, things might be a little bumpy until you get used to it again.The whole internship thing wasn't going as smooth as I thought it will. I wish it could all end up okay, if it weren't that case, then I am screwed. I need all the luck I could get, at least for the next 6 months. Since I came back, I had my share of fun and food. Until then, I will keep on crossing out the to-eat list that I pre-planned at Korea. It is almost complete, not until I finally get to go to Ipoh and Penang. Oh ya, my mum is going to Miri tomorrow for three days, need to take care of my sisters and wash the clothes. My fingers are painful because I cannot press the chords right on the guitar, I guess I have to keep on trying. I think my life is on track again.

Hopefully.

Going Home

2010-06-26T23:38:00.002+08:00

Going home had never been exciting for me, never. Not once in my 20 years of life you would hear me telling you that I am glad that I am going home. Not even in National Service, since the period was not as long as this. But I had been happy for three days now.

And it's all because I am going home.

No, I am not saying that Korea is boring or I cannot adapt to the lifestyle over here or what not. I suppose what other people say is always true, you only know how to appreciate things when you lost them. Now, I miss every single thing that my home has to offer. Surprisingly, I even miss that Proton Saga that is even older than me. I miss my mum's cooking, my sisters' laughter and above all I miss the sense of belonging the most.

Malaysia might not be a perfect place to live, but it's sufficient. I might not know what will happen to me or where would I be in the next 20 years, but I would be really glad to say, I'm from Malaysia. There's no place like Malaysia, especially when we talk about the food. Fate might bring me to various places around the world, but I would definitely come back occasionally just for the food.

Oh yes, the food.

Where on earth would you find a place that sell Wanton Noodles, Roti Canai and Ramly Burger at the same time? I personally think that it is very possible that Malaysia market as a food tourism country along with the whole eco-tourism hype now. I doubt any country could have so many types of food in one place anyway.

I am happy.

I am going home, in less than a month. Being in Korea for the almost-one-year period of time had truly let me reflect on myself, thoroughly. I am quite sure I know what to do, what I want and where am I heading to after this getaway from reality. Things that I seen, people that I met, stuff that I experience, would make me a better person. I don't hope for a lot of things, I just wish that I would have the time to achieve what I want before my time comes.

The year was blank, I would say. Blank enough which allows you to paint it yourself, by your way. I did a lot, I experience a lot, and I understand a lot more. I did the first video here in Korea, I went for a night hiking trip for the first time, I met a lot of Chinese friends, and most of all I lost 4kgs! Not much for a list of achievements, but it definitely prove that if there's a will, there's a possibility for it to happen.

My canvas might not be perfect, but I am dead sure that it is very colorful. For that, I am truly glad. The deadline for the canvas submission is here. I had to hand it in and continue painting the canvas of my life, embracing my future and make sure that I would not regret any moment of my life. Not for the things I had done, but the things that I did not do.

I cannot afford to waste any moment of my life.

The time is too fast, suddenly it's been a full academic year and I have to go back and finish what I started, of course, what I'm referring to is my diploma. If things would go on well, after a degree with the second year entrance, hopefully Korea would want to take me back for Master program.

Meanwhile, I have to do what I have to do.

But for now, it's almost time for me to go back. I really miss every single thing back there. I miss random supper with Stephanie, random Pyramid outing with Jane, random badminton session with Soon Queen, random trip with Esther, Calvin and Sharon. I miss my event management classmates. I miss every single on of them. Don't worry guys, I would make it up for the whole year while I'm not there.

I am coming home.

Are you at home?

飞吧！

2010-06-22T09:45:00.000+08:00

飞吧！去找寻自己的幸福。飞吧！去寻觅自己的未来。飞吧！去开辟自己的道路。

飞吧！

当你抵达那里的时候，请记得要回头告诉我，你一定会过得好好的。

The Bet

2010-06-21T07:44:00.001+08:00

And so I on top of the bet that I already got myself into, I had another bet with Adrian.

Well, both of us will do something positively to the personal development of ourselves within a year and by that time whoever that did not do it will have to suffer the consequences stated. Adrian is always on the thin side while I am always on the other side. Let's just say we are going to make the weight difference lesser. By the coming May when he comes back from America, he needs to gain 7kg while I need to drop my excessive love handles. Along with respective amendments which he needs to attain muscle mass instead of just fat, and I need to be able to do 50 push-ups by that stated deadline. If he did it, and I did not, I would have to play badminton for 4 hours straight and if I did it and he did not, he would have to swim 100 laps of freestyle straight. The bonus amendment is a meal decided by the winning bet fully paid by the losing bet. So if you did not do anything and the deadline is up, you are going to end up exhausted and broke. Aiks.

The duration we both have is 11 months.

I have 5 months of internship coming along. Well, I hope I can do it alright, if not I would need to pay for someone's travel expenses PLUS this 4 hours of badminton madness.

Oh gosh, wish me luck. =)

Bye, Teacher.

2010-06-18T23:09:00.002+08:00

It's been a year, teacher. Thank you for teaching us Korean and looking at our ridiculous final test paper today. All of us would return to where we come from, but how we all ended up in one class makes it all the more beautiful. Malaysia, Cambodia, Japan, China and Korea. Hopefully ten years from now, we would sit together just like today with you and laugh about the same thing we wrote on the test paper.

Junction, Turn Left, Turn Right and Go Straight.

Good bye, teacher.
We have no choice but to keep on going.
Thank you, teacher.
We will miss you, I promise.

Chinese Character

2010-06-15T01:23:00.000+08:00

The most difficult Chinese word. Aiks.

因为，我一直相信着。

2010-06-12T16:31:00.001+08:00

走吧！

往未来的路上走吧！

如果在路上再次相遇的话，就再一次拥抱问好。我不知道明天的我，会在哪里，会遇见什么人，会经历着什么事情，但是我还是一直相信着。相信这来临的明天，这条前往未来道路的尽头，会有我和你都期待的风景。“明天会更好"，我常常这样告诉自己。明天，应该会更好吧！

路上保重了，我的朋友。又或许路上会遇见什么问题，又或许路上遇见不对的人，笑一下吧！我会一直在这里，给你我的肩膀，借你我的耳朵，让你我的双手，拍一拍身上的灰尘，站起来！加油吧，我的朋友。能的，什么都可以办到的。你一定要坚持，一定要一直相信着你的梦想。

因为，我一直相信着。

Tell Me

2010-06-09T14:10:00.001+08:00

I feel detached but I am not lost.

Now, when everything runs on track, I am still standing at the side wondering whether I should take that train or not. I don't want to rush, rushing to somewhere I would never know what am I chasing after at the end of the day. I don't want to run, run to the direction where everyone else are running towards because not everyone knows why they are running, they just wouldn't want to be left behind.

And the rest just kept on going, somewhere.

I followed, once. Realizing that it is so redundant, trapped inside an endless loop, doing things that what others expect you to do. Life is not just like this. It is not framed by others, not defined by others. Life is about being different isn't it? No, I don't want to get married, have kids and then grow old without doing something else or just being what people think life is. Life is more than that, much much more than that.

Life is being special, isn't it?

I want to see the world. I want to learn, I want to experience and I want to know. What is wrong being like this? If the things follow the "order" of the nature, that probably placed us under the animal category. It might be unfair for me to judge, and it's nothing wrong following others because of insecurity and the ultimate marriage dream but please don't give me the look when you hear someone with a different idea about life.

Don't define how my life should be.

I will not be like you, accept it. I might be wrong, I might be right. You don't have to worry about me, I wish you all the best, and I hope you will do the same. I know where am I heading to, maybe I will be the same, but I will not be stagnant. Who I am to judge upon fate, but I would attempt to make my life memorable with my own ways.

Tell me, whether the grass is greener at the other side, whether the moon is brighter at the other side, or whether the air is fresher on the other side. Whether this is the life you had always wanted.

Tell me, when you get there.

Happiness

2010-06-05T23:35:00.000+08:00

幸福，我要的幸福。

在，不远处。

Night Hiking

2010-06-03T23:53:00.000+08:00

Went for the very first night hiking and realized that none of us has a proper torchlight. I learnt that in Korea, torchlight is pronounced as fu-re-shi (flash). It was a sudden decision, and yes, it was absolutely random. I adore randomness, I love minimal planning which only applies on outings, not anything major that will effect my future, my finance and my social lifestyle.

There were 4 of us, took the trail right behind over dormitory.

Wanted to go higher, but did not happen. There we were, sitting beside the big electric thingy and ate ramen and soba on top of one of the not-so-high hill. Discussed issues on the international aspect and then we head back down.

Total time taken, 4 hours max.

Happy birthday, Yazhou.

Traditional Chinese Attire

2010-05-31T21:07:00.000+08:00

Finally I get to wear it, with jeans. Lol.

华语古文吓死人！

2010-05-30T23:58:00.008+08:00

1：季姬击鸡记

【原文】

季姬寂，集鸡，鸡即棘鸡。

棘鸡饥叽，季姬及箕稷济鸡。

鸡既济，跻姬笈，季姬忌，急咭鸡，

鸡急，继圾几，季姬急，即籍箕击鸡，

箕疾击几伎，伎即齑，鸡叽集几基，

季姬急极屐击鸡，鸡既殛，季姬激，

即记《季姬击鸡记》。

【翻译】

季姬感到寂寞，罗集了一些鸡来养，是那种出自荆棘丛中的野鸡。

野鸡饿了叫叽叽，季姬就拿竹箕中的小米喂它们。

鸡吃饱了，跳到季姬的书箱上，季姬怕脏，忙叱赶鸡，鸡吓急了，

就接着跳到几桌上，季姬更着急了，就借竹箕为赶鸡的工具，投击野鸡，

竹箕的投速很快，却打中了几桌上的陶伎俑，那陶伎俑掉到地下，竟粉碎了。

季姬争眼一瞧，鸡躲在几桌下乱叫，季姬一怒之下，脱下木屐鞋来打鸡，把鸡打死了。

想着养鸡的经过，季姬激动起来，就写了这篇《季姬击鸡记》。

2：《施氏食狮史》

【原文】

石室诗士施氏，嗜狮，誓食十狮。

施氏时时适市视狮。

十时，适十狮适市。

是时，适施氏适市。

氏视是十狮，恃矢势，使是十狮逝世。

氏拾是十狮尸，适石室。

石室湿，氏使侍拭石室。

石室拭，氏始试食是十狮。

食时，始识是十狮，实十石狮尸。

试释是事。

【翻译】

《施氏吃狮子的故事》

石室里住着一位诗人姓施，爱吃狮子，决心要吃十只狮子。

他常常去市场看狮子。

十点钟，刚好有十只狮子到了市场。

那时候，刚好施氏也到了市场。

他看见那十只狮子，便放箭，把那十只狮子杀死了。

他拾起那十只狮子的尸体，带到石室。

石室湿了水，施氏叫侍从把石室擦干。

石室擦干了，他才试试吃那十只狮子。

吃的时候，才发现那十只狮子，原来是十只石头的狮子尸体。

试试解释这件事吧。

3《羿裔熠邑彝》

羿裔熠①，邑②彝，义医，艺诣。

熠姨遗一裔伊③，伊仪迤，衣旖，异奕矣。

熠意④伊矣，易衣以贻伊，伊遗衣，衣异衣以意异熠，熠抑矣。

伊驿邑，弋一翳⑤，弈毅⑥。

毅仪奕，诣弈，衣异，意逸。

毅诣伊，益伊，伊怡，已臆⑦毅矣，毅亦怡伊。

翌，伊亦弈毅。毅以蜴贻伊，伊亦贻衣以毅。

伊疫，呓毅，癔异矣，倚椅咿咿，毅亦咿咿。

毅诣熠，意以熠，议熠医伊，熠懿⑧毅，意役毅逸。

毅以熠宜伊，翼逸。

熠驿邑以医伊，疑伊胰痍⑨，以蚁医伊，伊遗异，溢，伊咦。

熠移伊，刈薏⑩以医，伊益矣。

伊忆毅，亦呓毅矣，熠意伊毅已逸，熠意役伊。

伊异，噫，缢。

熠癔，亦缢。

注解：

①熠：医生，据说为后羿的后裔。

②邑：以彝为邑，指居住在一个彝族聚居的地方。

③伊：绝世佳丽，仪态万方，神采奕奕。

④意：对伊有意思，指熠爱上了伊。

⑤翳：有遮蔽的地方，指伊游弋到了一个阴凉的地方。

⑥毅：逍遥不羁的浪人，善于下棋，神情坚毅，目光飘逸。

⑦臆：主观的感觉，通“意”，指对毅有好感。

⑧懿：原意为“懿旨”，此处引申为要挟，命令。

⑨胰痍：胰脏出现了疮痍。

⑩刈：割下草或者谷物一类。薏：薏米，白色，可供食用，也可入药。

4:《于瑜欲渔》

于瑜欲渔，遇余于寓。

语余：“余欲渔于渝淤，与余渔渝欤？”

余语于瑜：“余欲鬻玉，

俞禹欲玉，余欲遇俞于俞寓。”

余与于瑜遇俞禹于俞寓，逾俞隅，

欲鬻玉于俞，遇雨，雨逾俞宇。

余语于瑜：“余欲渔于渝淤，遇雨俞寓，

雨逾俞宇，欲渔欤？鬻玉欤？”

于瑜与余御雨于俞寓，俞鬻玉于余禹，

雨愈，余与于瑜踽踽逾俞宇，渔于渝淤。

5、《易姨医胰》

易姨悒悒，依议诣夷医。

医疑胰疫，遗意易姨倚椅，

以异仪移姨胰，弋异蚁一亿，

胰液溢，蚁殪，胰以医。

易胰怡怡，贻医一夷衣。

医衣夷衣，怡怡奕奕。

噫！以蚁医胰，异矣！

以夷衣贻夷医亦宜矣！

6：《熙戏犀》

西溪犀，喜嬉戏。

席熙夕夕携犀徙，

席熙细细习洗犀。

犀吸溪，戏袭熙。

席熙嘻嘻希息戏。

惜犀嘶嘶喜袭熙。

P/S：来自互联网。

What Love Can Do?

2010-05-28T12:21:00.001+08:00

So, what real love can do anyway?

Accompaniment, Sex, Marriage, Responsibility, Kids and Death?

Silla Festival

2010-05-27T22:36:00.003+08:00

They had K.Will for the university's annual festival this year around.

When will the event industry in Malaysia be able to achieve this?

So Seoul!

2010-05-25T23:58:00.005+08:00

And so I went to Seoul again for 4 days and came back on a Monday morning. Went to Seoul, Yongin and also Suwon. Nothing too rush, nothing too planned, just a random trip.

Pre-depature preparation.

It was a Mugunghwa train to Seoul, which is the slowest and the cheapest train to travel far. This cost 25k won. Depart from Busan at 11.15pm and arrived at Seoul 4am the next day. Sat at the Mcd for breakfast and then proceed outside for a walk. It was 8am and we went to the bus station outside and wait for the bus number 5000. 1 hour later, exit at Gangnam University intersection and transferred to bus number 66.

7% discount for foreigners!

It was Everland for the first day right after another 30 minutes on the bus. Everland is a theme park and this cost 31k Won per person. Everland has a lot of turning and looping rides and the world's largest wooden roller coaster, which is also the place I lost my glasses. Spent almost 2 hours waiting for the ride, the ride is awesome, losing your glasses is not. Sat the a bus to go to Jamsil station and transferred to subway train and went to Myeongdong for dinner. Moved to Jongno 3-ga and stayed at a motel. One room - 40k won, public holiday eve was to blame.

Dongpo Meat!!

Woke up late next morning, walked to Myeongdong and went to eat Chinese lunch at Din Tai Fung. The cost, 20k won per person. The dishes, fried rice, Dongpo meat, Xiaolong Paos and dumplings. Attempted to walk to Itaewon but get lost in the Namsan area. Sat subway train at Chungmunro and proceeded to Itaewon. Realized Hard Rock Cafe at Itaewon is a lie and then went to Cafe Nescafe for refreshments.

Never knew Nescafe has a cafe.

Went to Dongdae Ibgu to go to Welcomm theater to see David Choi. The ticket, 35k won. Participated in the dancing competition, lost and see other people took the prize - a guitar and went home happily. Melissa bought his two album and had him autographed and we all took picture with him.

Finally got a chance to meet David Choi in person.

David uploading pictures to Facebook.

Went back to Myeongdong after that to meet some friends and then went to Anam station to find motel with a help of a Chinese friend. That motel that day allows 3 people in one room and the cost is 25k won. Played cards and went to bed after that.

Caribbean Bay entrance.

Woke up early the next morning and went to the same direction as the first day - Everland to go to the water theme park, Caribbean Bay. The cost, 30k won. It was fun, the water slides are very exciting, especially the Raft Boomerang. It started raining when we were queuing and it became very cold and windy. Luckily there is indoor part of the water theme park fully furnished with sauna and steam sauna. Stayed inside there for a while and took the bus and went to Suwon city after an hour in the bus.

On the bus for an hour or so doing practically nothing and the bus was surprisingly crowded.

The thing I depend on to get around Seoul.

Suwon city has this very big train station which enable us to go back Busan for here. Decided to stay here and went to find motel in this area. Found one 40k for 3 people in one room. Went out and had Pizza Hut for dinner. Cream Chicken Pizza and some fried chicken and a refillable drink, 20k won per person. Took money from the bank due to insufficient fund. Went back to motel and played card then slept.

Interior of Han's Deli.

The next morning woke up at 11am and went to eat lunch at Han's Deli. Ordered 4 dishes and it cost 8k won per person. Then went to train station and realized the train ticket to go back is all sold out except the midnight train, and we bought that. 24k won for one way ticket. Have to hang around at Suwon for 9 more hours. Went to the tourist center of Suwon and found out Suwon is boring, Went to walk around in the shopping complex and went to a bookstore, bought a bilingual book for The Little Prince, 7.5k won.

Feels like Sungei Wang + Low Yat, the whole row selling the same thing.

Found a pc room / cyber cafe and took the 3 hours package for 4k won per person and by the time we finished we went to eat Vietnamese for dinner. 20k won per person, Cashew Nut and Chicken, Noodle & Rice Set, Chicken Fried Rice and Pad Thai. Went to Dunkin Donut and bought some doughnuts to hang around there till 11pm.

We were so bored until we started folding paper planes. >_>

And of course, we played cards again...

Sat on the train and proceed back to Busan. It was 4am went we arrived at Busan. Took a taxi to go back to Sasang because the subway is not functioning just yet. 5k won for 4 people. Ate Pork Rice Soup at Sasang for 5.5k won per person and realized that it wasn't 5am yet. The dormitory's curfew is from 1am to 5am. Went to the arcade at Sasang and played drum. Walked back to the dormitory from Sasang.

Went online at once.

Slept at 7am, woke up at 3pm.

So Seoul?

2010-05-23T16:31:00.000+08:00

So I'm currently ended up at Suwon all the way from Seoul -> Yongin -> Suwon.

Amazing and random trip anyway, not to mention that we finaly met David Choi. We are suppose to be back tonight but apparently the train tickets are all sold out and the only last resort was the midnight train. I will upload photos and write a better blog post on this when I get back tomorrow.

Stay tuned! XD

Adult Day

2010-05-17T22:29:00.001+08:00

The third Monday of May is Adult Day in Korea.

In Korea, when a person reaches the age of 20, internationally or the age of 21, Korean age, they will be given roses, perfume and kisses on this day. When I came back from outside, the dormitory committees were kind enough to give a rose and a congratulation card to me when I thought nobody will know about this.

I became an adult at Korea, officially.

Sports Day

2010-05-16T20:22:00.005+08:00

I didn't expect myself to ended up going for a sports event over here in Korea. The venue was all the way at Busan National University, which is like 30 minutes bus ride from our school.

"Silla University Foreign Students Association"

I wasn't well enough to participate any one of them anyway. So, I was doing literally nothing under the big hot sun for a few hours and I am "red" right now. Felt like a walking corpse waking up at 7.30am on a Sunday morning. Not to mention the only breakfast that we got on the bus was choco pie, a small piece of cake and a box of milk.

Busan National University is separated into 7 sections and labelled with rainbow colour. Guess what? The venue is at the end of the campus, the biggest purple box on the picture.

I didn't bring and umbrella nor a cap. FML.

Well, I didn't expect it to be this sunny and this hot, so I was baked under the sunlight for the rest of the games. The games are very different from the usual sports day, this sports event had snooker under one of the competition, of course with the other normal typical games like basketball, soccer and table tennis. The running event is not the usual 800m run, but 3000m run. Talk about extreme endurance.

When all participants went to gather at the center of the field, basically nothing much left over here.

There was probably only 15 of us from various university around Busan as viewers.

Some of us. Oh, it's the Silla University FSA T-shirt anyway, damn friggin' ugly.

Lunch time when things are suppose to be better did not turn out to be the way I was expecting it to be. Walked down the hill and make several turns and we reached the huge canteen. I thought I am going to enjoy the lunch, apparently it had to be a complete-my-disaster set of the day.

I swear, this meat is sweet.

And so, after that, hanged out at the torturous place for a couple more hours and off I went back to dormitory to give my partially disabled leg a break.

P/S: I'm not going to post the rest of the random pictures I took, I would probably ended up being murdered.

My Eyes

2010-05-09T23:44:00.002+08:00

I never realized how scary my eyes can be.

Baseball Game

2010-05-07T23:18:00.001+08:00

We went to a baseball game.

Korea's national sports, highly impossible to not go to one while I am here anyway. It was free, so I am not going to complain about the fact that I didn't quite understand what's going on for the entire 2 hours. Anyway, baseball match? Crazy crowd. Koreans watch baseball, all of them.

Suddenly all of them would do Mexican Wave or started singing at random times. Then there was this kissing time where you are suppose to kiss each other when you are on the screen and also the sexy dance time where you are suppose to dance sexy dances and it will win you some vouchers for westerns restaurants.

Some guy proposed in the baseball game. To me, it looked so awkward. What make it even worse is that you only have 30 seconds to finish your propose. The guy appear with a bunch of roses, the guy kneel down, the guy kiss the girl, the girl cry. Done, 30 seconds. I wonder how much he paid to be in front of so many people.

Eui Hyeon said she forgot to bring newspaper. We didn't know what for until we were inside the stadium. Apparently, newspapers were made to pom-poms and everyone had it on their hands. Orange plastic bags are then distributed for people to expel rubbish and food waste but all of them went up everyone's head at the end of the day. Oh well.

After that we went back to Sasang and finally be able to eat our dinner at 11pm. The walk back to the dormitory was like the hike. =P And tomorrow is a weekend!

Colourful Alley

2010-05-06T10:58:00.000+08:00

Beyond these colourful alley
is a monotonous life of another person.
我怀疑，
在这彩色的门后面，
那些黑白交叉的人生。

Hiking

2010-05-05T23:09:00.002+08:00

I can't believe I went hiking when my leg is not even fully recovered yet.

We were bored, probably. Since today was the Children's Day at Korea, it is a public holiday. So, some random friend of mine suggested that it was fun to go hiking early in the morning. Thus, we ended up doing something so out of the blue.

Baekyang Mountain - Highest Peak

Me, Melissa, Zhang Xin, Su Sheng, Jia Wen, Wen Yu and Ya Zhou

The hill behind our dormitory is not as small as I thought it was. We started hiking at 9am and came down from the other side of the hill at 3pm. The route is maintained well thus not much of the problem going up, the moment we are moving downhill, it was like small rocks everywhere and our normal sports shoes are not helping at this kind of scenario.

Too tired to take too many pictures anyway.

We were half dead when we reached back to Mora. Yes, the place we departed from is Mora, went pass the hill, go to the highest peak and reached the other side of the hill which is the Children Grand Park, near Seomyeon. No lunch, my stomach almost started to sing already. I don't even want to know how Melissa can make it without breakfast and lunch.

It was very tired but we did had fun. When we reached the Children Grand Park, it was packed. There were so many people running all around with balloons and cotton candy. Talk about the perfect day to be here. So we finally exit the park and sat the bus back to Mora.

Couples, families, and even pets are all here in the park during Children's Day.

Wen Yu knew some Korean uncle and he was nice enough to buy all of us lunch (fried chicken and noodles) at Mora, after that we can't wait to get back to the dorm, the legs was killing me by then.

After a nice shower and it's already night time.

Tomorrow, everything will resume back to normal.

My Table

2010-05-03T23:23:00.000+08:00

I need to clean my table.

Typography - Niama

2010-05-02T01:06:00.000+08:00

Typography trial on Photoshop.

Played around with the transformation a lot.

Just a random practice that's all. =)

Creative Output - It's Spring Again.

2010-05-01T14:35:00.001+08:00

It's spring. Boy meets girl and they fell in love.
It's summer. Boy and girl is madly in love and think forever everything.
It's fall. Boy and girl don't feel the same anymore and the relationship cold down.
It's winter. Boy and girl decided to move on and not wasting each others' time then they broke up.

It's spring again.

What now?

P/S: Please excuse the cliche-ness of the short film.

韩语发表的草稿

2010-04-28T18:46:00.003+08:00

在韩国当交换学生的时间过得特别快，不知不觉我就要回家了。来了那么久，我经历的，我看过的，我尝试的，我觉得我这一生都不会忘记。就让我想你解说，我最喜欢韩国的五件事。

一，天气。我记得当我第一次抵达韩国的时候，给我们这些从热带国家来的人们最深的印象是这里的天气。整年都活在摄氏三十五度的我们，很喜欢四季的变化。我很喜欢春天的雨点，夏天的海边，秋天的落叶和冬天的雪花。也可能是因为这个原因，韩国人都比较浪漫吧！

二，情歌。说到浪漫，不可能没有韩国的情歌。没有人不知道韩国情歌的浪漫，没有人不知道韩国连续剧的伤感。在这情歌盛产的国家，不管在哪里都可以听到情歌。但是我注意到韩国情歌里，常见的单词排行榜有的是：“怎么办？”，“谎言”，“眼泪”，“疯了”，“痛苦”，“心脏”，“等待”，“幸福”，“忘记”，“笨蛋”，“为什么？”，“离开”，“时间"，”对不起“，还有“爱”。马上就可以来造句，不管怎么造都会有伤心的效果。

三，科技。没了科技，情歌该怎么样与世界分享呢？网速，决定你能做的一切。来到韩国，我可以上网看视频，我在马来西亚完全不可能做得到。马来西亚的平均网速为50kb/s，来到韩国我竟然可以看到宿舍里看到3mb/s的网速。对于一个常常用电脑的人，这是一件很幸福的事情。

四，韩语。韩语的文字很简单，结果到现在我们都能读懂韩语，但是完完全全都不知道我们正在读着什么。确实，不像其他的语言，韩语的构造分部分来读，只要把全部念出来就当作是会读了。

五，韩国人。韩国人的热情让我们感到很舒服。很友善，很有趣。特别是和他们一起生活了一年以后，明白了他们生活上的习惯等等，发现他们都很亲切。也可能是因为我好运吧！

Bubble

2010-04-26T13:29:00.000+08:00

Kite

2010-04-25T20:59:00.001+08:00

I flew a kite today, for the first time.

For some reasons, I saw the same resemblance on me.

I might be up there having fun,

but there's still a string,

I will want to go home, eventually.

你，过得还好吗？

2010-04-22T16:53:00.003+08:00

不知不觉地，我已经在这里过着我第八将近第九个月了。
第一次在异地一个人生活，我应该觉得快乐吗？
可能我快乐，可能我没有。
我休息了那么久，是时候再次出发了。
我在这里过得蛮好的。

不知道，你过得好不好。

你没有上网的习惯，我不是不知道的。
我常常望着msn发呆，我也觉得很傻。
等待着你上网的机会毕竟不是零。
这不代表我过得不好，而是我又开始怀恋了。
看着你的facebook的status，一起跟着那些情绪的起伏。
这比一般的电影情节来的好，至少我们还有facebook和msn。
听说科技可以拉近彼此的距离，但他们忘了说：科技也可以让人更遥远。

不知道，你在那里过得好不好。

不是我不能适应，只是在现实的摧残下，我还在寻找着那遗失的美好。
以前简单的相处方式，以前直接的坦诚相对。
面对这新的世界，新的人，新的事情，新的选择，有时还真的很累呢。
我想你也应该是这样想的吧。
在这里可能是因为语言，我从来没有那份融入的感觉。
常常很像个路人，看着人家的忙忙碌碌和人家的风风雨雨。
听说这就叫做停滞在一个地方，看着时间的流逝，但他们忘了说：停滞的人们不想停下来，他们只是怀恋过去。

不知道，你在那里和他们过得好不好。

Depression Factors

2010-04-20T20:33:00.004+08:00

I can get depressed. Yes, I can. Fortunately, it does not appear rather frequently and does not induce me to a suicidal attempt.

After I came to Korea, I finally pinpointed what are the reasons that cause these negative feelings built-ups. There are exactly 3 reasons that could very likely results in crankiness, irritation and ultimate sarcasm which exclude all the other probabilities which yet to be explored. This 3 factors mentioned below have to work closely to each other to produce the best result.

1. Bad Dinner
Dormitory food is filled with surprises. Sometimes it could be good and sometimes you just feel like dying just by looking at the menu. About Korean food, I am not sure whether it only apply to the dormitory scope or not but I realize that they bear the following conditions:

A) Any food will have the "R" probability.
Here refers to the fact that any kind of ingredients from vegetables to meat and all the way to soup too can be prepared in a way that it is entirely red. Red food usually taste spicy in a very salty and sweet way. The Worst Case Scenario: The entire food tray for that night is red.
(Dish1*A)+(Dish2*B)+(Dish3*A)+(Soup*A)+(Kimchi*A)+(Rice)

B) All vegetables are cold.
Here refers to only vegetables regardless whether it is taugeh or a weird leaf thing that does not look edible at all. Vegetables are suppose to be eaten cold so that the nutrient values in the vegetable could be retained, but excuse my Chinese-ness, cold dishes other than appetizers and desserts are unacceptable. The Worst Case Scenario: Bibimbap. (Rice + A + B) - Meat

The only way to temporarily relieve this sorrow is this if and only if Factor #2 allows.

2. Money (Lack of)
It is a fact that $200 in Korea is never going to be enough, even when the food and accommodation had been covered. To move to one place and come back easily cost $4 and one meal might be $5 and above. For a Malaysian, this is very painful. After the currency exchange, out meal back in Malaysia is $3 comes with lots of meat, lots of rice, a bowl of soup and a beverage like sugar cane drink. So, being an underpaid exchange student working in the university while studying, I am constantly broke. This condition is much more bearable if it is one sole problem without the influence of the Factor #1.

3. Undesired Physical Conditions
Immobility is something that I personally cannot tolerate. Being stationary at a spot bore me to the point where I will pull out all my hair and whine for 24 + hours. Undesired physical conditions here refer to any kind of sickness which result in utter tiredness or a hole on the sole of the leg.

There you go, 3 depression factors especially when you are overseas.

FML.

8eight - Sing to the Lost of Love.

2010-04-15T10:16:00.000+08:00

Remember to breathe sometimes, don't drown.

Remember to remember sometimes, don't forget.

Remember to appreciate sometimes, don't lose it.

Summer Monster

2010-04-12T18:59:00.001+08:00

One thing that I am annoyed about summer is the insects,
especially flies and mosquitoes.

No, summer,
don't come so soon, please.

A Cup of Coffee

2010-04-11T21:13:00.001+08:00

Sitting at the cafe in front of the dormitory with a bunch of them. The entire night. Sunday night, just a bunch of us, occupied the cafe till they all started to mop, signalling us to leave. For the entire time, only one cup of coffee is purchased. A cup of coffee for 3 hours of chatting moments.

I adore randomness, I just realized.

The topic ran from getting married to where do people go after they die, discussed with an international aspect, which triggers my brain cells after I hadn't utilized them wisely for the past 6 months already.

"Life is a cup of coffee," I told him. Depending how much sugar you are willing to add in so that it will be better. "Life is a cup of bitter tea." He told me. It might be bitter for a while, but it will not be bitter forever. "Life is a cup of coffee." I told her. You get to decide how your coffee would taste like, when will you taste your coffee, and how you will remember your cup of coffee, forever. "But some people like it bitter." She told me.

"And I don't like coffee."

What if I don't like coffee, it's not like I can change to a cup of hot chocolate anytime soon. Choices are expensive, even changing your flight date cost money. Making changes require cost, nothing is ever easy in life.

Can I have my cup of hot chocolate?

What if hot chocolate is too expensive and I can only get a cup of Earl's Grey instead? What will I do then? Maybe I should feel content with what I have, I wouldn't want to risk. Even if life is a cup of coffee, I wouldn't want to miss the hidden greatness in the coffee will still wandering what I would choose other than coffee.

Perhaps a cup of Caffe Latte will do?

Someone told me I don't have a clear stand, usually standing in the center wandering left and right. It's a personality, I guess, although I didn't quite like it. Indecisive should be my middle name, despite that I didn't quite like it. It's not going to bring me anywhere.

Should I just bloody drink that coffee already?

What if I regret for the rest of my life? I still have to do something. Probably buy a cup of milk to standby. Whatever that I would choose, I have to do it fast. My sister is next in line, and my dad is thinking how to pay for the coffee for both of us.

I might need a waiter or a menu now.

Hello Spring

2010-04-08T13:21:00.000+08:00

Hello spring, nice to meet you for the first time.

Such beautiful cherry blossoms you have there.

Skipped

2010-04-07T08:33:00.000+08:00

Skipped the class for 2 weeks already.

I really did felt the love, especially when you wake up and you say to yourself, "It's okay to skip it." Last week for me to do this, I guess. Have to attend the class before the lecturer remove me from the attendance list.

Permanently.

Such a dreadful class. Seriously, major subjects conducted in English is difficult to understand and I did not mean the subject. So, unless you are sponsored by the government or are a native Korean born and raised at Korea, if not you are going to suffer.

The other class that I enrolled was Linear Algebra 1 which was suppose to be taught in English but I have to drop it after the first class because the class was taught in Korean due to the fact that the teacher trying to make it easier for the majority of the class to understand regardless whether we understand at the end of the day or not.

Well, I am glad I'm only an exchange student and my credit hours doesn't count over here. So I told myself that it's okay to do bad things once in a while far away from home, repeatedly.

Probably too much.

It ain't good.

But I felt the love, the love of peace and quiet. =)

LOL Moment

2010-04-06T20:45:00.008+08:00

I miss you guys, so much. It was so much fun and random moments.

By the time I go back to reality, it will not be the same anymore.

Live well, my friends. But don't forget that I'll still be there, always.
P.S: William's pose is so damn funny.

小幸福

2010-04-03T13:39:00.000+08:00

空闲的下午，幸福。

无聊的下午，搬了电脑下去和Melissa一起坐在咖啡厅里玩电脑。

两个无聊的人，一个慵懒的午后，简单的小幸福。

不需要管什么东西，不需要在意任何问题。

外面的阳光好灿烂。

Twenty

2010-03-31T21:42:00.000+08:00

Twenty.

I'll be twenty by tomorrow. But I still feel so dependent towards my family, causing so many problems, financially. I don't like this feeling, not at all. My sister is going to graduate and enter college by the time I finish my diploma, and I have no idea what am I going to do.

I call this, irresponsible. Me, that is.

Well, I have four choices. I can go to cheap university but might not learn something, I can go to good university bearing the cost by applying for loan, I can apply for Korean Government Scholarship and come to Korea to study degree for 5 years(provided they take me) or I can go to work and save some money before I proceed to my degree.

I don't know where will I end up at.

Insecurity makes me uncomfortable. My mum is not able to assure me. The only thing she said is "Wait until you come back first then see." Life is way too interesting with all these choices. All the responsibilities upon those choices you make. All the unknown ahead that you never know until it hit you right in the face. At that very moment, probably everything is way too late already.

Happy birthday, I wish myself.

Despite how much I didn't want to do it. I don't want to grow up, I really don't want to. All the problems, all the choices, all the responsibilities. Apparently I don't have a choice but to do it anyway. Growing up is harsh, I have to agree on that.

Here am I, saying it once again.

Happy Birthday, to me.

LOL Moment

2010-03-29T17:35:00.001+08:00

William + Ham = PWNED!

Earth Hour

2010-03-27T22:47:00.003+08:00

I wasn't expecting to celebrate it. Hell, I didn't even know that today was the day for the Earth Hour thing. Not to mention my stupid immobility condition, going out is highly unlikely to happen. I was in the room sitting in front of the computer planning to do nothing at all.

Suddenly, I was in the dark corner right next to the gymnasium playing candles, scented candles.

It was all Sarah Chai's fault. Melissa tiba-tiba told me that they are going to celebrate Earth Hour in the cafe in front of the dormitory. So, I thought since it was only in front of the dormitory and I had nothing to do, I might as well just sit down there for an hour and chit-chat. I was bored to death anyway.

Sarah picked up his brother who was only here for three days and bring him to the dorm.

Then I realized that no, they are not celebrating it there. THEY WERE GOING TO THE POND, which it didn't happen later due to the lightings and all. And so, we found ourselves a very dark spot next to the gymnasium then we sat down and....

We lighted our CANDLES!

Yeah, basically that's about it.

P.S: We ate chicken for supper!

P.S.S: We refers to Melissa, Sarah, Ashley, Sarah's brother, James, and I.

Break Time

2010-03-26T19:51:00.002+08:00

Probably a very long break time for me.

Of Chicken, Pizza and Delivery in Korea

2010-03-25T17:49:00.002+08:00

I always wonder why am I constantly hungry at Korea. Especially now, when I'm temporarily disabled. I want to eat chicken. There's something in Korea's chicken, maybe. But we don't really do this in Malaysia, at least we don't go to the hypermarket grab the box of chicken then run back to the dormitory then put it in the microwave, look at it spin for 3 minutes and finish the entire box of chicken in 10 minutes.

Amazing speed.

Oh yes, we are like wolves in Korea. Chicken is sort of like a consolation prize, making up for our lack of ability when it comes to adapting the Korean food culture. Maybe it's just me, but I miss Malaysia's food, a lot. At least our vegetables are hot, and we don't randomly add chili paste into any of our dishes of the day.

Then there's also this delivery thing, so-bloody-awesome. "Chicken Delivery" is what we call it. It's like KFC delivery, except this may come with noodles or pizza. The price is around RM60 for a big piece of pizza, a whole fried chicken and a 1.5 L Pepsi. Another method of self-pampering when dorm food sucks.

Well, the best thing is that he will deliver the food straight to your doorstep. You know those lazy and hungry nights? Prefect. Ordering it wasn't a problem at all, apparently. Maybe the owner already familiar with those foreigners with sudden cravings for chicken, We greet, we say what we want (E.g Bu go gi pi za seh te), we tell him where are we (E.g Dormitory of XX Uni) and we pay him when he calls you again and tell you that he is outside already. Done.

Malaysia don't have lor.

I guess I'll settle it with Ramly's when I get back to Malaysia then.

P.S: I miss Ramly Burger. (Still the best in the world)
P.S.S: Melissa is another chicken addict.

Surgery in Korea

2010-03-24T23:41:00.002+08:00

Suddenly, I had a surgery in Korea.

I went to the hospital just wanted to get the infections on my right foot checked at the first place, who the hell will expect 30 minutes later I was lying on the operating theater waiting for the doctor to come and have fun with my leg. I'd been thinking for a long time actually, thinking to whether go to the doctor and check or just wait till I get back to Malaysia. But, since the Korea insurance covers everything except the teeth.

Why not?

But I seriously didn't except it ended up so big case which result in me, immobility, one and a half month. My roommate wanted to borrow a ~~wheelchair~~ crutches from his friend for me. Not much for a choice I guess. Apparently I have to spend my birthday on the bed for this year.

Oh well.

Edit: I have a pair of stick now and a weird shoe for my right foot. For free.

Rubik's Cube

2010-03-24T00:44:00.001+08:00

This thing is addictive, I taught Melissa from 9am to 9pm.

All because of Adrian.

Bobby Kim - That Thing Called Love

2010-03-23T00:27:00.000+08:00

Lyrics

늘 혼자 사랑하고 혼자 이별하고

늘 혼자 추억하고 혼자 도망치고

사랑이란 놈 그 놈 앞에서

언제나 난 늘 빈털털일뿐

늘 혼자 외면하고 혼자 후회하고

늘 휘청거리면서 아닌 척을 하고

사랑이란 놈 그 놈 앞에서

언제나 난 늘 웃음거릴뿐

사랑해 널 사랑해

불러도 대답 없는 멜로디

가슴이 멍들고

맘에 문은 멀어도

다시 또 발길은 그 자리로

사랑해 또 사랑해

제 멋대로 왔다가

자기 맘대로 떠나간다

왔을때 처럼 아무말도 없이 떠나간다

늘 기억땜에 살고 추억에 울어도

늘 너를 잊었다고 거짓말을 해도

숨을 삼키듯 맘을 삼키고

그저 웃으며 손을 흔든다

사랑해 널 사랑해

목이 메여 불러도

너는 듣지 못할 그 한마디

고개 떨구며 사랑 앞에 난 또 서있다

사랑해 널 사랑해

제 멋대로 왔다가

자기 마음대로 떠나가고

왔을때 처럼 아무말도 없이 떠나가도

모른척 해도

날 잊는대도

사랑은 다시 또 온다

그래 아직 내 가슴은 믿는다

사랑

사랑은 다시 또 온다

Translation

We always love alone, breakup alone

We always remember alone, run away alone

In front of this thing called love

I’m always empty handed

We always pass by alone, regret alone

Always act steady when we are shaken

In front of this thing called love

I am always made a fool

I love you, I love you

The melody that never responds when I call

Even if my heart is bruised

Even if the door to the heart is far away

Once again my feet walk towards that place

I love you, I love you

It always comes

and goes as it pleases

It leaves as quietly as it comes

We live and cry because of memories

Even if I lie and say I’ve forgotten you

I swallow my feelings as I take in the air

And I smile as I wave my hands goodbye

I love you, I love you

The words that you will never hear

Even if I call you till I thirst

Here I stand, my head shaking in front of love

I love you, I love you

It always comes

and goes as it pleases

It leaves as quietly as it comes

Even if I ignore it

Even if I forget it

Love always comes again

Yeah, I still believe my heart

Love…

Love always comes again

[This Site]

Goodbye Winter

2010-03-22T12:38:00.000+08:00

Good bye winter though I experienced you for a little while only, though I see it snowing for that once only.

It was really fun I must say. =)

Stephanie + Cat!

2010-03-19T19:46:00.002+08:00

[XKCD]

Specially for Stephanie, good luck with your cats. =)

Popcorn Day

2010-03-18T18:16:00.002+08:00

There was this Popcorn Day at Silla University.

Career Fair thingy with a fancy name, that is. The person in charge wanted us to open the cafe at 8am and at the end of the day, they came in at 8.35am.

Aih.

Oh, and this thumb print personality test thing, but it's written in Korean. The guy didn't bother to explain to me, he told me to "go and study more Korean".

Aih.

They don't even care whether the spelling of the event is correct or not. Everywhere the banners wrote "Pop Corn Day". Sorry, but I cannot take ignorant people. Especially advertising when your reputation is on stake constantly.

Aih.

Pi Day

2010-03-16T23:35:00.007+08:00

I never knew Pi have a day of it's own, which is on the same day as White Valentine.

Pi, Greek letter , is the symbol for the ratio of the circumference of a circle to its diameter. Pi Day is celebrated by math enthusiasts around the world on March 14th. Pi = 3.1415926535…

{PiDay.org}

So anyway, Happy Pi Day to you too!

>.>

Korean Essay

2010-03-15T20:49:00.000+08:00

I have to write a Korean essay.

The title is "My Hobby" and I have to write 300 words of it. It isn't hard, for a Korean. For me, it feels like I am all the way back in primary school again, struggling to construct proper sentence and making sure it make sense too at the same time.

Stuck at 133 words.

I couldn't explain why I love photography in Korean.

Oh well.

White Day

2010-03-14T22:52:00.003+08:00

We decided to treat ourself, even if it had nothing to do with us whatsoever.

P/S: This cake was gone in 3 minutes.